Charas-Project

Off-Topic => All of all! => Topic started by: Trevlac on August 11, 2005, 04:43:38 AM

Title: Man, I love yogurt
Post by: Trevlac on August 11, 2005, 04:43:38 AM

So I opened up the lid of a yogurt and underneath the lid it said "Please Try Again" because they were having a contest that I was unaware of.

But I thought I might have opened the yogurt wrong.

Or maybe Yoplait was trying to inspire me... "Come on Daivs, don't give up, please try again.  A message of inspiration from your friends at Yoplait.  Fruit on the bottom, hope on top."

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Post by: FFL2and3rocks on August 11, 2005, 04:45:06 AM

One time I got a bottle of something out of the fridge and it said "Twist to open".

So I set the bottle on a table and I started doing The Twist, but the bottle just sat there.

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Post by: blackskullwarlock on August 11, 2005, 04:45:31 AM

Man, I love frosted flakes. But I got a try again message too....only difference is that I can't try again because I'm not feeling like buying another box of cereal past midnight, lol

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Post by: Trevlac on August 11, 2005, 04:46:00 AM

This is officially the "post your facorite comedian's joke" thread XD

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Post by: FFL2and3rocks on August 11, 2005, 04:46:27 AM

I want to see a forklift lift forks.

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Post by: WarxePB on August 11, 2005, 04:46:50 AM

Contests like that suck. There's all of a 1 in 603 billion chance of winning anything, but still people go out and buy another one just to try and win something.

It's like gambling, I guess.

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Post by: GhostClown on August 11, 2005, 04:46:53 AM

I think that prize under the lid thing is a fake!

Does anyone ever win?  :eyes:

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Post by: CoolZidane on August 11, 2005, 04:47:33 AM

I had seen a contest on boxes of Fruit Loops, and I was hoping to win. I bought a box of Fruit Loops, but, to my misfortune, I lost. However, I was left with an inspiring message: "Please try again."

And so, thanks to the Fruit Loops, I have the confidence to try again when I fail.

If this story inspired you, send it to 10 friends and you will get a wish.

(This thing was all my original material, not a comedian's; in fact, the main point of the joke is the last sentence)

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Post by: Trevlac on August 11, 2005, 04:48:18 AM

A tortilla is a sleepingbag for ground beef.

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Post by: Trevlac on August 11, 2005, 04:50:01 AM

Quote

Originally posted by CoolZidane
I had seen a contest on boxes of Fruit Loops, and I was hoping to win. I bought a box of Fruit Loops, but, to my misfortune, I lost. However, I was left with an inspiring message: "Please try again."

And so, thanks to the Fruit Loops, I have the confidence to try again when I fail.

If this story inspired you, send it to 10 friends and you will get a wish.

(This thing was all my original material, not a comedian's; in fact, the main point of the joke is the last sentence)

Fruitloops'll give you cancer.

Yeah, there was this guy, he ate some fruit loops, 2 weeks later; BAM! Cancer.

EDIT: -.- Someone just deleted their post.  Now it looks as thought I've double-posted.

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Post by: FFL2and3rocks on August 11, 2005, 04:51:27 AM

One time I put a dollar into a vending machine and got a Coke. I took off cap and under it, it said "You have won one free 1-liter Coca-Cola product!" But the cap wouldn't fit in the vending machine so I couldn't redeem it. :(

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Post by: blackskullwarlock on August 11, 2005, 04:51:42 AM

Contests on food stuff are so fake. That's a bit like the 'Be spotted drinking a pepsi and win'

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Post by: AsakuraHao2004 on August 11, 2005, 04:53:13 AM

What... the... ??

Have you all gone insane?!?!

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Post by: CoolZidane on August 11, 2005, 04:53:23 AM

I always hate having to use the equipment after these huge buff guys who move, like, the entire rack of plates. Then I get on, and move two plates, you know like: CLANK! CLANK! "I'm the two plate guy!" CLANK! CLANK! "Anyone wanna spot me?" CLANK! CLANK!

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Post by: FFL2and3rocks on August 11, 2005, 04:55:07 AM

One time I was reading a box of Pop-Tarts... they have instructions on them. You'd think the first step would be "Toast the pop-tarts". Nope, the first step is "Remove pastry from pouch." Ohh!! Step two: "Insert pop-tart.." Ohhh, ohhh... "Vertically..." Ohhh!!! oh, oh!!! "Into toaster!!" Oh my god, I gotta get a toaster!

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Post by: CoolZidane on August 11, 2005, 04:55:47 AM

Quote

Originally posted by FFL2and3rocks
One time I was reading a box of Pop-Tarts... they have instructions on them. You'd think the first step would be "Toast the pop-tarts". Nope, the first step is "Remove pastry from pouch." Ohh!! Step two: "Insert pop-tart.." Ohhh, ohhh... "Vertically..." Ohhh!!! oh, oh!!! "Into toaster!!" Oh my god, I gotta get a toaster!

Ahh, you know Brian Regan as well.

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Post by: blackskullwarlock on August 11, 2005, 04:56:28 AM

Some food products have the dumbest things written on.

Peanuts bag have 'Could contain peanuts'

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Post by: FFL2and3rocks on August 11, 2005, 04:59:33 AM

Quote

Originally posted by blackskullwarlock
Some food products have the dumbest things written on.

Peanuts bag have 'Could contain peanuts'

That reminds me, some lady sued some fast food place because she spilled her hot chocolate on herself and got hurt, and she said she had no way of knowing that the hot chocolate was hot.

Um, hello?! Lol...

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Post by: CoolZidane on August 11, 2005, 05:00:33 AM

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Originally posted by FFL2and3rocks

quote:

Originally posted by blackskullwarlock Some food products have the dumbest things written on. Peanuts bag have 'Could contain peanuts'

That reminds me, some lady sued some fast food place because she spilled her hot chocolate on herself and got hurt, and she said she had no way of knowing that the hot chocolate was hot.

Um, hello?! Lol...

That reminds me as well, a man was robbing someone's house, but he got injured while he was robbing it, and so sued the guy he was robbing.

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Post by: Trevlac on August 11, 2005, 05:03:44 AM

Quote

Originally posted by CoolZidane

quote:

Originally posted by FFL2and3rocks quote: Originally posted by blackskullwarlock Some food products have the dumbest things written on. Peanuts bag have 'Could contain peanuts' That reminds me, some lady sued some fast food place because she spilled her hot chocolate on herself and got hurt, and she said she had no way of knowing that the hot chocolate was hot. Um, hello?! Lol...

That reminds me as well, a man was robbing someone's house, but he got injured while he was robbing it, and so sued the guy he was robbing.

The person in question fell through the man's roof onto a knife or letter opener and impaled himself.  He then sued and the court granted him.

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Post by: Cerebus on August 11, 2005, 05:04:44 AM

I've heard that one day, a guy wanted to imitate Yamakasi ( or something like that ) by jumping from one roof to another, but he fell...then the mother sued the owner of the building. Well...something like that...

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Post by: Sephiroth12317 on August 13, 2005, 03:06:05 AM

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Originally posted by Cerebus
I've heard that one day, a guy wanted to imitate Yamakasi ( or something like that ) by jumping from one roof to another, but he fell...then the mother sued the owner of the building. Well...something like that...

o..k Whats the funny part? I dont get it...lol

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Post by: Cerebus on August 13, 2005, 03:14:59 AM

This is not funny, but it is really stupid.

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Post by: CoolZidane on August 13, 2005, 04:02:01 AM

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Originally posted by Sephiroth12317

quote:

Originally posted by Cerebus I've heard that one day, a guy wanted to imitate Yamakasi ( or something like that ) by jumping from one roof to another, but he fell...then the mother sued the owner of the building. Well...something like that...

o..k Whats the funny part? I dont get it...lol

The mother is suing the owner of the building the kid was trying to jump to but fell instead.

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Post by: Relentless Soulscar on August 13, 2005, 09:58:29 AM

Quote

Originally posted by Trevlac
So I opened up the lid of a yogurt and underneath the lid it said "Please Try Again" because they were having a contest that I was unaware of.

But I thought I might have opened the yogurt wrong.

Or maybe Yoplait was trying to inspire me... "Come on Daivs, don't give up, please try again.  A message of inspiration from your friends at Yoplait.  Fruit on the bottom, hope on top."

That comedians name is Mitch Hesburg, he recently died of drug abuse i believe... Might have not been DA but he did die a few months ago. One of my favorites.

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Post by: mind-master: brain(mmb) on August 13, 2005, 10:11:02 AM

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Originally posted by AsakuraHao2004
What... the... ??

Have you all gone insane?!?!

XD

lol, contests on food.... errr... i dont think those things even EXCIST in holland O_o

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Post by: Dominant on August 13, 2005, 03:52:30 PM

Ron White's Tater Salad Joke.  It's way too long, I do not have the patience or the time to write the whole thing.

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Post by: Drighton on August 13, 2005, 03:57:27 PM

hmmm. had to of been 2nd or 3rd grade. There were these little gummy mario snacks, and if you found the blue princess you won some cool nintendo stuff.

needless to say I found it, and sent it off eagerly awaiting my prize.

two years later, I get a letter in the mail. "We're sorry, this promotion is no longer blah blah blah." Must have gotten lost in the mail or something. I ate it.  :D

Quote

Originally posted by Relentless Soulscar

quote:

Originally posted by Trevlac So I opened up the lid of a yogurt and underneath the lid it said "Please Try Again" because they were having a contest that I was unaware of. But I thought I might have opened the yogurt wrong. Or maybe Yoplait was trying to inspire me... "Come on Daivs, don't give up, please try again.  A message of inspiration from your friends at Yoplait.  Fruit on the bottom, hope on top."

That comedians name is Mitch Hesburg, he recently died of drug abuse i believe... Might have not been DA but he did die a few months ago. One of my favorites.

What! No! I liked that guy. :smoke: in peace Mitch

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Post by: Dragonium on August 13, 2005, 04:05:46 PM

Tesco Value Eggs: "ALLERGY ADVICE: Do not consume if allergic to egg". O_o

Quote

That reminds me, some lady sued some fast food place because she spilled her hot chocolate on herself and got hurt, and she said she had no way of knowing that the hot chocolate was hot.

I also heard of a lady who sued McDonalds for not serving her properly. She asked for two McGrills, one with Bacon and one without. Then sued the place because the one that was meant to be with Bacon had no Bacon and the one without Bacon had Bacon on it. XD

Oh yeah, just remembered.

Tesco Tiramisu Pudding: "Store correct way up". (Printed on the bottom of the box).

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Post by: White Dwarf on August 13, 2005, 04:23:19 PM

I found a boc saying "DO  NOT  TURN BOX UPSIDE DOWN AT ALL"  It was printed on the bottom of the box.  Also I remember a competishion with chrisps where you won something if you found a prive in the chrisps, some lady sued the comany, she said that she had found a prize but they wouldent give her the money, she explained the prize was a chrisp, and that it dident tell her anywere that the chrisp couldent be bcounted as the prize, she won £500 in the cort case.


OOOoo!, one guy managed to get away from a shop with £700 worth of stuff for free, the shop only had tills that said "please pay here" and no were else said you HAD to pay, after taking the shop to cort over this he won and got away with the stuff. This was down my high street.

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Post by: Tomi on August 13, 2005, 05:49:49 PM

Written on the bottle of sleep aid:
May cause drowsiness

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Post by: Moosetroop11 on August 13, 2005, 06:33:58 PM

This topic is... Incredibly strange. But who am I to wreck other's fun? Let's see...

Ever noticed that on the pepperami packets it says 108% Meat? Kinda fishy, huh!

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Post by: charaman on August 13, 2005, 06:39:12 PM

Quote

Originally posted by Dominant
Ron White's Tater Salad Joke.  It's way too long, I do not have the patience or the time to write the whole thing.

Same. I tried to find it, but failed

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Post by: RPG LORD on August 13, 2005, 08:03:43 PM

'I never thought I'd be frying over a jungle!'
-an image on Engrish.com

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Post by: FFL2and3rocks on August 13, 2005, 10:03:09 PM

 

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Post by: Relentless Soulscar on August 14, 2005, 08:36:56 AM

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Originally posted by Drighton
What! No! I liked that guy. :smoke: in peace Mitch

Lol! Yes, Mitch was a serious pothead (got to love them).

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Post by: Master Yoda on August 14, 2005, 09:22:50 AM

An american man walked up to me after a show and said "I think you were paytronising." I said "I'll think you'll find that's pronounced patronising. It means when someone talks down to you. Don't worry about it though, I'm too busy thinking about important things that you wouldn't understand"         Jimmy Carr live at the Royal Albert Hall.