Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 22, 2006, 01:52:55 AM
So far i have one chapter done,
Story: Many years ago five swords were forged, one was given to each of the great races, The Human's recieved the phoenix Feather, The Dragoons were given the Dragon Tooth, the wolfen (Claim to have wolves as their ancestors) got the Wolf Jaws (2 swords) and the Demons got the chimera tail. The Chimera Tail was the most powerful of the 5 and the dragoons grew jealous. The dragoons claimed that the Wielder, the great Demon King Daridus, was growing thirsty for blood, after twenty dragoons were killed mysteriously, The dragoons declared war on Daridus. They severely under estimated him. His armies marched over the dragoons destroying fortress after fortress, The dragoons reluctantly asked the Humans and wolfen to aid them, and with their help they pushed Daridus back to his castle, in the confusion of the fighting three of the greatest warriors from each race entered the castle Drake, the human knight and wielder of the Phoenix Feather; Nero, the wolfen shadow and wielder of the Wolf Jaws, and Rin, the princess of the Dragoons and wielder of the Dragon tooth. They all challenged Daridus to a fight.
The heroes were losing till Rin, sacrificed herself and sealed her and daridus into the chimera blade, taking the dragon tooth with her... But the chimera blade spoke to Drake and Nero, claiming that if it acquired the correct souls, Daridus would be unleashed, far more powerful then ever. When the blade said that the "Last of its kind" was one of the souls, The races began to panic. The dragoons claimed the wolfen were closest to extinction and the Dragoons began massive genocide upon the wolfen, Drake stepped up to defend his ally... But the phoenix feather failed him and he perished. That left Nero, he was killed at the last true stronghold of the wolfen by two dragoonic knights, Nova and Atrix... Nova resigned from the knights and dissapeared soon after. The wolfen came together in the secret city of Aneris, but they knew the day would come when the dragoons would find them
Characters
Drake: A human Knight killed long ago by the dragoons
Nero: A mysterious wolfen who was killed by Atrix and Nova
Nova: A dragoon, relinquished his knightly hood as a way for repenting for his sins
Luna: A wolfen girl living in Aneris
Shockwave: ???
More to come
Post by: DragonBlaze on September 22, 2006, 02:29:14 AM
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 22, 2006, 02:31:25 AM
Thank you for looking at it though
can you tell me what you dont like and what you do?
Post by: DragonBlaze on September 22, 2006, 02:46:39 AM
I think the base of your story has some real potential, but you need to work on some of the details.
First off, the swords. They were forged and given to each race. Who forged them? Why was one given to each race? If you want this to be a secret, instead of having them just given to each race, you could have each race already having a sword that is passed down by family lines or something like that, and then later in the story you can reviel who created them and why. I think if you would do something like that were the races already have their swords, it would be better. Like I said earlier, LotR has rings given to each races, and since that became a very popular story now, you probably want to stay away from starting like that.
I don't think you can avoid the battle with the bad guy, but there are ways to make it work better with the story. I don't know how your game starts out, but if you could find a way to leave the whole battle and such or even the whole intro out, that would be good. Then, throughout the game, you keep learning more and more about it until you get the complete picture. But anyway, just be careful on where you put your emphesises.
Then I think the rest is sounding pretty good, and you could really make something good out of it.
Do you have any screens? Could you post how the game starts out as well, like the first 10 minutes or so?
Your character information coudl be a bit more detailed as well ;)
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 22, 2006, 07:17:19 PM
Post by: DragonBlaze on September 22, 2006, 07:21:14 PM
At least change the heros graphics to something non-rtp. A lot of people will bash your game just for that if you go out and advertise it.
EDIT: Your walls aren't really made right either. You need a wall tile and a seperate ceiling tile, your using a cieling tile for the walls and ceiling, and it doesn't look right.
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 24, 2006, 04:04:41 PM
can you remake that map using the chipset that i used so that i see what it should look like? i won't use yours i just want to know what it should look like
default dungeon chipset just so you know
Post by: I Have a Sandwich on September 24, 2006, 04:42:34 PM
Quote
Originally posted by Anubis_Soldier
default dungeon chipset just so you know
Just because of that, it will never look incredibly great. It could look good, but not great.
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 24, 2006, 04:49:33 PM
Off topic: i thought your avatar thing was a sandwich?
Post by: I Have a Sandwich on September 24, 2006, 04:54:02 PM
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 24, 2006, 09:08:04 PM
plz tell me what needs to change
Post by: Ephiam on September 24, 2006, 09:15:12 PM
Post by: koopa-on-fire on September 24, 2006, 09:23:23 PM
Post by: DragonBlaze on September 24, 2006, 09:43:40 PM
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 24, 2006, 10:09:16 PM
Maybe you will like it, maybe you wont
Long ago a great demon was defeated ending centuries of darkness, however, not all was bright.
Over a period of time a new demon took over the territories of the old Demon, his name was Daridus and he claimed the vacant throne as Demon King. Under his rule, the Demons, Dragoons, Humans, and wolfen lived peacefully together. It would not last...
A robed figure visited the most powerful human knight named Drake, He challenged Drake to a duel and defeated the knight. Never knowing defeat the knight asked the cloaked figure how he did it... He said nothing but left the sword that he had used against Drake, months later the hooded figure visited the King and Queen of the dragoons, he gave them a sword as well, and left without any words exchanged. The figure gave Nero a ninja wolfen twin katanas and left just as mysteriously as he had appeared to Nero. The hooded figure then came to the demon king... He challenged the king to a fight. As Daridus fought the figure, he realized that the sword he wielded belonged to the old king. He slayed the robed figure and took it for himself. The dragoons heard that the other races had gained a sword from the figure as well, the dragoonic king was infuriated when he heard the Daridus had the old king's sword. He became jealous, and he had his armies attack Daridus' territories. Daridus struck back and drove the dragoons back, Daridus' armies were within miles of the Dragoonic capitol. The king pleaded with the other races to help him, claiming that darkness would return to the lands. They reluctantly helped the dragoons and drove Daridus and his forces back to his castle... Drake; Nero; and the Dragoonic Princess, Rin; infiltrated the castle and prepared to assasinate the king... what happened in his throne room is unknown but it cost the life of Rin and sealed Daridus into the old kings sword... After reading old texts, the dragoons learned Daridus could be unsealed if specific souls were accumulated and brought with in range of the sword... It was then found that one of the souls was to be the last of its kind. The Dragoonic king decided massive genocide of the smallest race would take care of the soul that was needed, The dragoons targeted their former allies the wolfen... They attacked the Wolfen capitol suddenly and without warning, the city was completely wiped out. Upon realizing what was going on, Drake stepped in on the Wolfen side, not even the sword given to him by the hooded figure, the phoenix feather, could prevent his death. After the death of Drake, Nero gave up fighting and was killed soon after. The wolfen fled to their last stronghold, the secret city of Aneris, where they wait for the dragoons to come and end it
Post by: koopa-on-fire on September 24, 2006, 10:22:19 PM
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 24, 2006, 10:44:49 PM
here is a current pic
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 24, 2006, 11:00:41 PM
Post by: DragonBlaze on September 24, 2006, 11:12:43 PM
The map isn't bad for an rtp map. Remember how your old map looked a lot better when it was made with a non-rtp chipset? I think the same will be true if you found a new chipset for this.
Like I said before, it isn't really that bad, just keep practicing and you'll get better.
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 24, 2006, 11:28:28 PM
if you have any chip sets that could work plz show me them
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 24, 2006, 11:37:22 PM
this is a redo of the Dragoonic throne room from b4
Post by: I Have a Sandwich on September 24, 2006, 11:39:53 PM
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 24, 2006, 11:46:45 PM
Post by: I Have a Sandwich on September 24, 2006, 11:57:57 PM
Post by: aboutasoandthis on September 24, 2006, 11:59:22 PM
Oh and make sure you use the
<
img
(space)
src
=
(You'll see this part as http:...whatever)
>
That will make your picture full size.
I can't believe I never used this. ;)
Post by: Meiscool-2 on September 25, 2006, 06:25:09 PM
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 26, 2006, 01:10:38 AM
Post by: koopa-on-fire on September 26, 2006, 01:23:33 AM
Post by: plightofthepureblood on September 26, 2006, 03:49:13 PM
Daegrants...or Vagrons....
hehe....
seriously though
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 26, 2006, 07:29:20 PM
The second picture is of a potential character, the problem, i need a battle char set to go with him, and because of the limited resources for the battle generator and the fact that i have no artistic skils i am unable to make him, If any of you could help it would be much appreciated, just needs to be standard RTP style battle char set
PLZ HELP ME, i will post this under requests as well
sadly, i wont be able to truly continue till the Battle Chara continues
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 26, 2006, 11:21:36 PM
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 27, 2006, 03:28:20 AM
Post by: Bhall on September 27, 2006, 06:52:54 AM
Post by: Bhall on September 27, 2006, 06:54:24 AM
Post by: Bhall on September 27, 2006, 06:56:55 AM
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 27, 2006, 07:36:28 PM
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 27, 2006, 11:44:49 PM
Post by: koopa-on-fire on September 27, 2006, 11:50:12 PM
Peace out,
KoF
Post by: Meiscool-2 on September 28, 2006, 01:55:20 AM
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 28, 2006, 02:04:47 AM
and meiscool, this is kinda random... (and selfish of me) can you make a battle character for me? cuz from what i have seen, you are quite artistic
Post by: I Have a Sandwich on September 28, 2006, 02:36:55 AM
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 28, 2006, 02:47:50 AM
Post by: Bhall on September 28, 2006, 05:44:29 AM
Post by: Meiscool-2 on September 28, 2006, 07:34:48 PM
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 28, 2006, 07:44:09 PM
darn, that means more work for me...
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on September 30, 2006, 01:55:33 AM
Post by: Bhall on September 30, 2006, 02:46:09 PM
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on October 05, 2006, 09:08:07 PM
Drake
Job: Human Knight
Legend Blade: Phoenix Feather
Drake was considered the strongest of the Humans. He never lost a duel till he faced a hooded man, after being defeated by the hooded man, he left Drake a sword that he called the Phoenix Feather... soon after that duel, the fight between the Vagrants and the Dragoons began, He sided with the dragoons and made friends with Rin, the princess of the Dragoons
Rin
Job: Dragoonic Princess
Legend Blade: Dragon Tooth
Rin was the princess of the dragoons, when the hooded man gave the dragoons the Dragon tooth, the king decided that Rin may use it. Considered to be the kindest creature to walk the earth, she rarely if ever used the sword... After she acquired the blade she met Drake and an old ally named Nero. Sadly she is said to have met her demise to Daridus, King of the Vagrants
Nova
Job: Ex-Dragoonic Knight
Legend Blade: None
Said to be the oldest dragoon ever, his age is not quite known because he seems to claim something different, it is estimated to be between 5000 to 10000 depending on how Nova feels... He left the Dragoonic Knights after the death of Rin, whom he considered to be his sister
Nero
Job: Wolfen Shadow
Legend Blades: Wolf Jaws
A mysterious wolfen with a dark secret known only by Nova and Rin... Comparitivly weaker then Nova and Rin, he rarily speaks to anyone
Luna
Job: Wolfen
Legend Blades: None
A wolfen girl... she is the only one left after the raid on Aneris
Aroyu
Job: Dragoonic Prince
Legend Blade: Inherited the Dragon Tooth from his sister Rin
Far to young to fight in the Vagrant war, he became Nova's apprentice at a young age, his training was never completed because of Nova's long absense
Satumi
Job: Dragoonic Princess
Legend Blade: None
Born soon after Rin's death, she is soft spoken and kind just like her sister was
Riaden
Job: Vagrant Soldier
Legend Blade: None, but owns a sword known as the Shocu, which can be compared to them
A rather young Vagrant, he was for Daridus' rule over the Vagrants, fought valiantly under Daridus. After Daridus was sealed, he found himself without a job and turned to becoming a hit man
Shockwave
Job: *Error
Legend Blade: None, has an odd weapon that fires bursts of energy
Not much is known about the organism known as Shockwave... other then the fact he travels to Barnaris and stays at the inn everyday, he has never been seen outside of Barnaris
Atrix
Job: Royal Knight and Prince
Legend Blade: None
The first son of the King, when offered the Dragon Tooth, he declined. He is in charge of the extermination squad that killed Drake and the wolfen Nero.
Daridus
Job: Sealed Vagrant King
Legend Blade: Chimera Blade
An oddity among Vagrants. He preferred to have a non violent reign as king and actually did it, considered a hero amoungst the Vagrants. He was sealed away in the last battle of the Vagrant War
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on October 28, 2006, 01:44:52 AM
Well, where i left off, i needed a tutorial for making a party changer... I am gonna try to figure it out on my own, but any help would be appreciated
Bhall, do you know of a Tileset that i could use for a recked city, like one that has had an atomic bomb dropped on it??
Post by: koopa-on-fire on October 29, 2006, 12:17:07 AM
EDIT: The main character in my party can not be changed, so he's not on there.
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on October 29, 2006, 02:29:55 PM
I have started work on my first true dungeon
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on November 01, 2006, 04:00:42 AM
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on November 05, 2006, 09:17:15 PM
(Thanks for the charas generator Alex)
Post by: Anubis_Soldier on November 06, 2006, 04:16:20 AM
http://rapidshare.com/files/2177045/Legend_Blade.lzh.html
The intro is pretty much just words, no cool effects yet, sorry...
It is chapter 1 of my game, I kinda rushed it...
Tell me what you think and if it is the Worst thing you have ever played,
Thanks
Post by: SilverBlade on November 06, 2006, 04:08:58 PM
Then I arrive at tocity, the tileset may not be RTP, but all the characters,and the battles, are! They are completely RTP even the 'victory song'! I got bored quickly so I quit...
But don't worry, it's not the worst I played :happy: . As it would be useless to give critism without a few tips, I will now provide you some:
1. Make the intro with special effects. Show the players what happens. Let the characters do all the talking work, not you. And make sure to put a background music.
2. Delete the RTP's, replace them by (own)made resources.
3. Get good battlesprites, battle music, victory music AND make the battle a little bit more unique(Overdrive's, special skills by equiping different weapons...)
4. Use some light effects(example: the sun is shining on your village)
5. Change the Title Screen Music(the title screen is good, but the music is again, RTP.)
6. Use proper english(mine isn't that good either, but I try ^^). 'I' is not i. Use capital letters!
Well, that's all I can think off. Don't worry, if you follow my tips, your game will look a lot better
[GLOW]SilverBlade[/GLOW]
Post by: Bhall on November 07, 2006, 11:42:47 AM
Quote
Originally posted by Anubis_Soldier
Bhall, do you know of a Tileset that i could use for a recked city, like one that has had an atomic bomb dropped on it??
Sorry I haven't reply cuz I was busy but to answer your question sorry I don't have any but you could look through the resources on this site or try the other sites like gamingw or others and maybe you'll find somthing.