Charas-Project
Off-Topic => All of all! => Forum gaming => Topic started by: aboutasoandthis on November 27, 2006, 03:08:02 AM
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This kind of thing might have happened before. The goal is to basically make a story.
Each post can have up to two sentences. Short ones like "Shut Up" count too. These will be used to make a short story. After a big enough amount of posts, or when a lot of people say it's finished, I might assemble them up to make one big story.
So you just have to add two sentences to the story. Try to relate them to the last two. If you wanna post something else, make sure you put a marker or something where your part of the story is.
To Start:
It was a cold, cold Saturday night. Outside, you could feel winter's grasp on your ears.
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As you look up in the sky, you notice that the sky is cloudy. A light snow is falling, with the slight breeze blowing it around.
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The breeze, you realize, carries with it, the pungent aroma from the cheddar mill you loved as a child.
"But those days", you remind yourself"....are over."
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Suddenly, the sky lights ablaze. Turn to page 2 if you want to run, or page 12 if you want to stay and watch.
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Page12: You watch at your own disbelief cursing your sight of there mockery
Before you floats a large wheel of cheese!
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You feel the grasp of sanity on your brain loosen. Everything around you, trees, clouds, rocks, all of it, it is all melting away and replacing with the image of god, laughing in your face as if your entire life were a lie.
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Not part of the game: LOL!
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But suddenly, you awaken in a daze, and everything is back to normal. Seems like the effect of those 'shrooms is wearing off.
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Turn to page 45 if you want to use more shrooms. Turn to page 27 to wander the streets aimlessly.
((Hooray for choose your own adventures!))
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Page 45: You decide to eat a lot of drugs and drift race in the snow.
You go home to fetch your keys and cocaine.
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As you turn to leave, you trip over a corpse, and your car keys are burried deep in the man's skull. It would seem that, in you drug-induced state, you've killed a passerby.
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Upon closer inspection, you realise there must have been a fight, as you are missing your left arm from the shoulder down.
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"as your attourney, I advise you to check into the stardust Hetal and Casino"
You look to your left, and the visage of Benicio Del Torro, portrayed as an overweight samoan drug fiend lets you know that the first drugs, havent run their course yet.
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He waves a rotten fish in your face, saying "You are way too high to go anywhere!". He vanishes, and you are left alone, in the cold.
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You get gemini's reference, and run off screaming about how Johnny Depp killed a man. The tugging on your leg was imagined, because it was a gay plot device.
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(THANK YOU MM. Seriously)
You wonder why the hell anyone would employ such a gay plot device, and then it all comes to you:
Its like your life is being told through a series of 2 sentence installments, and you suddenly long for something more, something...you can call....home.
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So, you do what any other person would: You got into your car and drove off to the real-estate dude. The gaudy man wearing a pink suit says to you, "Hello."
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You're about to reply when a small burnt up piece of metal from a meteor that entered the atmosphere goes through the guy's eye socket and kills him instantly.
"Now that is incredibly unlikely, like 1/10000000000000000000" you say out loud."
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"Theres only one thing left to do now," You say.
"ive got to buy a lottery ticket".
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You turn into the gas station to go buy a lottery ticket. Suddenly, several masked men carrying guns emerge from a van.
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Holy Hell! He TURNED INTO A GAS STATION? WHAT WITCHCRAFT IS THIS??!!?
Sorry, I could not resist.
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The men begin shooting you. You run, but bump right into another man carrying a gun. He points it at you, preparing to shoot.
You hear a shot.
You open your eyes to see all the men dead around you, filled with bullet holes. How? Why? Where?
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(ZOMFG. UR ALL UZING 2 MNY SENTECIS)
Pulling a coin from you belt, you decide its time to rip it up old school.
"ITS MORPHIN TIME"
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You look down at the coin, which turns out to be a quarter in reality.
"I should lay off those 'shrooms"_sweat_
Suddenly, a dark figure taps you on the shoulder. You turn around.
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"Dude" Shouts you, as you see that the dark figure is your old frat chum, "Dickie".
"Waves, Brah," saya dickie "lets go get a couple of greasy weaslers, and stoke up a vibe with the ladies, brizzle" Dick Continues.
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Just then, Dick remembers that he's gay.
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"D-d-did I say ladies?" Dick said. "Heh... Uhh... I meant... Laddies! Yes, let's pick up us a few boys, ay?" You always were fond of the way he tried to be straight.
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Thus, you get into Dick's pink '69 Cadillac and go looking for some guys to pick up. However, you realize that you never bought your lottery ticket.
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You tell dickie that you never got what you were looking for. In reply, dicky says, "**** you." And pushes you out of the car, off a highway.
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You reflect for a moment on your failed relationships.After realizing the lottery ticket is gone, it all piles up, and you cry a little on the roadside.
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Three hours pass before a rather fine looking car pulls up beside you.
A figure walks out of the car and asks in an unmistakenably feminine voice, "Are you alright?"
You look up to see...
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...the hooded figure of Death.
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And next to this figure of death, you see the visage of a beautiful maiden.
"Who's that?" You ask the woman, reffering to the hooded figure of death.
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"That's Death," she replies. "Remember the gunfight? You were supposed to die."
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Death: I need more souls!!
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And then he points to a third figure, an incredibly hot girl wearing a t shirt that says "I AM NOT DEATH"
And you say "No, stupido, the hottie...who is it?"
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Boobieous: I'm Boobieous.
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You mean, "Boobieus, daughter of the lordess of the third moon of ellendar?!?"
"Yes...thats me."
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Death: "Why is everyone ignoring me? :'("
You: "Shouldn't you be somwhere right now?"
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"Yes." Death replied.
"It's time for battling Simon Belmont." And with that, Death went off, and suddenly became non-omnipotent.
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"Well, Boobieus," You say,"We'd best get pickin some twigs, if were gonna win the basket weaving tourney"
"Yeah" Says Boobieus
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"There's just one problem." Said Boobieous.
"WHAT'S THAT!?" You yell frantically for no reason.
"The last time I wove a basket... the Holocaust happened."
*Flash Back*
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You suddenly remember you're the reincarnation of Adolf Hitler.
You start to lexure Boobieous about how the jews got what they deserve.
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Then it happens again; You realize that you're losing sanity, and that you must quickly take a rest.
"I'm so sorry." You tell Boobeious, "I'm... Mentally... UnstaAaAaAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA" and then you lose all control.
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You use your latent supernatural abilities to summon Mel Gibson and Michael Richards. With Death handing all four of you (including Boobieous) AK-47s, you become the Four Horsemen.
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You and the three other horsemen begin to ravage sinners and hobos. But riding a horse saddleless up in the sky gets uncomfortable, and you get a monstrous wedgie.
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despite having godly powers as an immortal incantation of a biblical monster, you feel unfulfilled in life.
You suggest to the other horsement, that you all take a course down at the local community collge.
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Luckily, sex ed had an opening, so you desided to take that first.
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I've created a monster: A small one, but a monster.
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... Said death, so he took out his scythe and cut the entire colledge into two. "It's time..." Death said to the four horsemen.
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"Oh noes!" Screamed the young rich boy. "I'm to young and rich to die!"
"We arn't here for you." Death replied.
"Oh...." He said, realizing his mistake all to late.
"And clean up your pants." Death muttered. "You smell like Tomi, who is in this college and I am here to kill."
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You informatively tell death that Tomi had just graduated, and moved to California.
"WHAT!?" He replies, while taking out his scythe to behead you.
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Me as a random college student comes up to death and says, "Well there are two ways to get to Tomi to kill him: 1. fly to california and 2. wait till the alumni reunion. It's your choice not mine, just thank me for the help."
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"Sure, I shall thank your for the help little boy that has never seen a vagina and asurely isn't in college." Says Death. "Yourthanksisdeath!!!!" *kills little boy that has never seen a vagina and asurely isn't in college.*
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Now feeling fulfilled, you decide to go and induce some pestilence-based suffering on others. However, some guy walks up to you and says "Pestilence? Pah, that's the wimpiest of the Horsemen!": you respond by giving him AIDS.
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It was mic that got aids and dies because death said so, "die mic your soul is mine and since it wasn't eh76's time yet ill revive him." Eh76 revives and teleports back to Florida.
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^ Thankfully, he just made me the main character of this story. Bow to me!
"All is well," You think to yourself.
"Wait a minute!" Screams Boobieous. "My water just broke!"
"You're with child!?" You yell out loud, already knowing the answer.
"No," She says idoitically. "I mean the water in my bottle broke, it's not hydrating me anymore!" She states in her blonde voice.
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Of course, you can't do anything to her (she already has AIDS), so you keep your mouth shut. Man, being Pestilence does suck.
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Boobieous finds a bunch of shrooms and eats them.
"Oh dear, it's so hot in this oven... an oven... whoa...."
You look over at her
Turn to page 420 to eat shrooms or 99 1/2 to kill her in some obscene yet entertaining way.
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You've desided to turn to the hidden page, 99 1/2.
You rape her, giving her a new form of AIDS now known as Super AIDS. She isn't dead yet, but you can rest assured knowing that she will die in 4 to 6 weeks.
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But then! Cancer in the form of Tom Cruise appears! He says that he's here to jump on your couch?
Turn to page 34 if you inform him you have no couch.
Turn to page 165 if you have a couch that you did not mention at any point previously in the story.
Turn to page 99.5 if you want to read this page again.
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You watch as Tom Cruise breaks his neck while jumping on your couch.
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You then tell him not jump on the couch, but he don't listen. He begins jumping again, and in the process, gets kidney stones.
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Then the Teenage Mutant Ninja turtles confess that they had stunt doubles.
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You pull out your +5 Mace and own the Ninja Turtles for even joining the storyline, Then you take your .9mm to Tom Cruise. Do you feel the need for speed?
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Barney falls through the ceiling nearly on top of the dead turtles and starts swearing **** those splinters! alot.... Stops after seeing the gun and Cruise then starts singing the I love song you song (or w/e the hell it is) to stop the violence....
(Edited off story: I just want to see the purple dinosaur die and how is cruise still moving? Did'nt Meiscoll kill him off...)
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An then, the insainity begins. You grab your 2x4 that you knicknamed "Soul Pole" and go to work...
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Mr. T busts in holding Bob Barker. He puts him down gently and a boxing ring appears because it can.
Turn to page 2 to place bets on Bob Barker
Turn to page 3 to place bets on Mr. T
Turn to page 4 to give all the retahded random actors AIDs. (Yeah, massive orgy)
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I gotta know, do the retarded random actors include Mr. T and Bob Barker? If so, Then Page 4.
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*Pulls out -19 Sword of Slaying and owns Darrellito*
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To bad for you i have my +18 battle axe. And wtf happend to the story, lets not get off topic.