Charas-Project
Off-Topic => All of all! => Topic started by: jynce on August 03, 2007, 10:34:19 PM
-
Here's my three stories about my friends...
One day me, and my friend Efren went to the deli, and when we were coming back we noticed these jehovah's witnesses had left jesus posters at his house, so then we noticed my overly religious friend roan coming there, so we picked up some nails, off my friends porch, and we decided to make Roan mad, so we would crucify jesus, when we showed Roan, he pushed me, and tried to fight me, but then he walked away, and told me to go burn in hell, we both had crucified jesuses but Efren put nails in his balls, and forehead.(Lol, I though It was funny.)
Another story,
Once upon a time, I was in my backyard, and I was bored so I was standing on top of things as if I was flying, above the world I stood on the pool ladder, and It felt good however I wanted to stand on something lower to the ground, so I stood on the stone flower pot, it flipped over, and It hit my stomach, and cut my chin, and it gave me a but chin, and caused internal bleeding.
About 3 weeks ago my friend Efren was coming over so I attacked him and ran in my house, Then i locked all the doors, Then....He try to open a window and he accidently breaks it and he thinks everything is all fine....Then about 5mins later he see blood dripping on his knee and hes like,"wtf". Then he finds out he has a Giant piece of Glass in his Hand About 4 inches long and about 1/2 inch deep in his finger.......He had to go to the hosiptal.....He Had a broken finger with his bone sticking out and had to get stitches.............yesterday he got the cast thing tooken off and his finer looks cool but it has a giant bump on it.
Post your funniest stories about you.
_________________
-
All three stories are just.. retarded.
Um funny story... some girl i knew who an ex-friend of mines called sloppy oppy fell down the stairs and rolled. Best I can recall.
-
Originally posted by jynce
One day me, and my friend Efren went to the deli, and when we were coming back we noticed these jehovah's witnesses had left jesus posters at his house, so then we noticed my overly religious friend roan coming there, so we picked up some nails, off my friends porch, and we decided to make Roan mad, so we would crucify jesus, when we showed Roan, he pushed me, and tried to fight me, but then he walked away, and told me to go burn in hell, we both had crucified jesuses but Efren put nails in his balls, and forehead.(Lol, I though It was funny.)
That's absolutely terrible.
-
It really is.
-
I guess I got something silly and dumb.
So I was at a party. The party was back in 2004, and was held at the end of the school year. There was all sorts of stuff there. DDR, A gamecube and PS2, activites outside, and some stupid murder mystery thing I didn't participate in. No, nobody got killed or anything, it was just a silly little contest that was held. Anyway, I was playing Soul Calibur II on the Gamecube. One game was against my friend, who was a bit better at me at the game. He was playing as Mitsurugi, I Yoshimitsu. Toward the end of the battle, I was about to lose. My friend was all like "Get back here and die", and I was like "No, wait... I got one last trick up my sleeve.." And entered in what I thought was the combination for Yoshi's death copter attack.
And as it turned out, it wasn't the death copter attack, but his very powerful, short range, and utterly silly suicide attack. And I ended up stabbing myself in the gut and losing the battle.
Yeah. That's it. Dumb.
-
lol at Bluhman. :p
Jynce, your stories aren't funny... at all... In fact, they're kind of a mix between everything but funny.
-
One time I raped my sister and got aids. Apparently she got around.
-
Awww, you people lack a thing called humor, I find them funny. It seems that making rpg games made you guys act like a bunch of strict jews.
-
Originally posted by jynce
One day me, and my friend Efren went to the deli, and when we were coming back we noticed these jehovah's witnesses had left jesus posters at his house, so then we noticed my overly religious friend roan coming there, so we picked up some nails, off my friends porch, and we decided to make Roan mad, so we would crucify jesus, when we showed Roan, he pushed me, and tried to fight me, but then he walked away, and told me to go burn in hell, we both had crucified jesuses but Efren put nails in his balls, and forehead.
Wonderful. I bet you feel proud of yourself, don't you? Maybe if we all picked on people who were religious, the world would be a "better" place. :)
-
Originally posted by Midnight
All three stories are just.. retarded.
Um funny story... some girl i knew who an ex-friend of mines called sloppy oppy fell down the stairs and rolled. Best I can recall.
Okay THAT made me laugh. XD
I guess I'll add something. I remember the time I went to Myrtle Beach. worst.vacation.ever. Be warned, it's a llllllllllooooooooonnnnnnngggggggggng story.
At the start of the trip, my mom caught laryngitis and couldn't really speak. A few days into the trip, the main highway was closed. We stopped at a gas station.
We met this white guy who found out about my mom not being able to speak. He was really nice. He did something really weird though. When my mom mentioned how we were going to Myrtle Beach, he gave us some maps and very specific instructions. He also told us not to stop no matter what, saying not even his family goes into where we were going.
I figured out why he didn't want us to stop. We drove for hours into the night. I clearly remember it being midnight and being wide awake. At first what I was seeing was normal, mostly small towns. Then I started seeing weird stuff. I saw more than seven churches on one street alone. I saw street names like "Claw Creek" and "Gator Street." I didn't see any cars. Eventually, I clearly saw an advertisement for a white supremest organization. I then saw a two, count them, two anti-lynch law signs. The road we were on was never straight. My mom kept accidentally pulling into the side roads. I'm not usually scared, but I was freaking out at that time.
It was almost 3 o'clock in the morning when we got to our hotel. We still weren't at Myrtle Beach. This was like a pit stop. A friend of my uncle owned the place. At least there was a pool. There were even a couple kids my age there. We had a party.
I was at first talking to this girl. I noticed my little brother was pushed in the water. I got mad and in my rush pushed the girl I was talking to in the water. She got mad, slapped me, then pushed ME in the water. nuff said' I remember watching Bambi on TV later that night.
So we get to Myrtle Beach and our second hotel. It was interesting. There were college kids left and right. We didn't go to them, but there were a lot of stores and stuff. Surprisingly, the locals were black.
My mom sortof did this illegal parking thing. Our car was *supposed* to be towed within two hours if we did not get back. She wanted to get really close to the beach. So we get in the water. It was a high tide. About five feet out into the coastline, there were four foot high waves. They were pretty strong too.
My brother and I were playing really far out, getting knocked down. My mom is trying to scream for us to get out of the water when I see her fall down. She looked really scared. I didn't think nothing of it at first, but then she whispered (I heard something pop!). It took a few minutes, but I had coaxed my little brother to help me pick here up.
I looked at the lifeguard who was sleeping. :dry: While still carrying my mom, I started screaming HELP! HELP! There were people just looking at us and not doing anything. I remember seeing this one woman with her hands on her hips and her head tilted to the side. I screamed "MY MOM IS HURT! WHY ARE YOU JUST STANDING THERE! HELP US!"
We managed to get my mom at least to the beach towel. I started walking over to the lifeguard screaming for help, when this girl runs up to me saying "Would you like to use my phone?" For a white girl, she was pretty...and she was smiling...she was probably in college...I think she liked me...My mom tried to scream and made this whistling sound. I snapped out of it and convinced the girl to help me go get the lifeguard.
The girl with the cell phone called the ambulance. The lifeguard didn't do squat. He just rand over next to my mom. It even looked like he was running in slow motion or something. WTF?
So then the ambulance comes. The guy asked me if I knew how do drive, which I didn't at the time. I then remembered that the car was supposed to be towed by then. I told him I couldn't. I again started freaking out.
Probably out of sympathy, they let me ride in the front seat of the ambulance. That was pretty cool. The seats were sort of leaned forward. I felt like I was going to fall out.
So we get to the hospital. My mom's leg was broken. We were pretty much sitting in the hospital, for an hour, in cold and thin clothing waiting on what to do. I didn't even have a shirt on.
So we called my dad. I remember this exact quote:
"Okay so let me get this straight. Ya'll are not at Myrtle Beach, your mother's leg is broken, the car is fin' ta be towed, and your mother has laryngitis..."
I then called my grandmother (mom's side of the family). She and my mom's sisters were on their way, unaware of the situation. I remember all of them going crazy in the background. The hung up before I had the chance to tell them the hospital address.
I ended up getting kicked out for accidentally using the phone in the Emergency Room. I also had my shirt off. My grandmother finally came to the hospital. I almost didn't recognize her as she was in a rental car. They said that they had stopped at two other hospitals before getting to the right one.
It was dark, but my mom was finally released. She was give a cast and crutches. My grandmother dropped us off at our car. Luckily, I guess, my mom broke her left leg and could still drives. It was hard though. We ended up getting caught up in the main strip of Myrtle Beach in the night. Drunk college kids left and right. We eventually made it back to our hotel.
I was made my mom's personal slave for a while. I was never used to doing so much for a person. We ended up meeting this lady who taught my mom to use here crutches effectively. She said that she was in a car accident, a heavy one. I remember her stating that at least one of her arms and one of her legs were broken. How she survived I do not know...
We couldn't go home just yet. We had to go to my cousin's graduation. He was a really cool guy. He makes tracks for local MCs in the North Carolina area. We then as a family went out for pizza.
So we take the drive to Alabama, where my grandmother lives. My dad ended up taking the Bus to meet us there. He had some adventures of his own, horrifying ones...
There was a lot of other stuff that happened including me making a dent in the rental car. This is enough for now.
Was that like six posts when I first started? damn <.<
-
0_0
Jesus Aboutaso, you really like to type. =P
Earlier tonight my friend said to me "Can me and my gf borrow your car?" And I was like, "Hell no."
Haha, things are always funnier when they happen... -_-
EDIT:
I figured out why he didn't want us to stop. We drove for hours into the night. I clearly remember it being midnight and being wide awake. At first what I was seeing was normal, mostly small towns. Then I started seeing weird stuff. I saw more than seven churches on one street alone. I saw street names like "Claw Creek" and "Gator Street." I didn't see any cars. Eventually, I clearly saw an advertisement for a white supremest organization. I then saw a two, count them, two anti-lynch law signs. The road we were on was never straight. My mom kept accidentally pulling into the side roads. I'm not usually scared, but I was freaking out at that time.
This surprises me, though I have a sick feeling it shouldn't. When did you guys take this trip?
-
...Yeah, I could picture that as being funny, but you'd have to be there; similar to the phone ringing, I'm in the hallway as I put the phone to my ear and accidentally, practically yell."Who is this!?"
Well, a few nights ago, my brother was bugging me about asking my parents for a copy of WoW:BC.
She asks."Why don't you just borrow his?" and I only manage to say."NO." before I started coughing from some water an hour or so earlier. We were all just standing there awhile, and then burst out laughing.
-
Originally posted by drenrin2120
I figured out why he didn't want us to stop. We drove for hours into the night. I clearly remember it being midnight and being wide awake. At first what I was seeing was normal, mostly small towns. Then I started seeing weird stuff. I saw more than seven churches on one street alone. I saw street names like "Claw Creek" and "Gator Street." I didn't see any cars. Eventually, I clearly saw an advertisement for a white supremest organization. I then saw a two, count them, two anti-lynch law signs. The road we were on was never straight. My mom kept accidentally pulling into the side roads. I'm not usually scared, but I was freaking out at that time.
This surprises me, though I have a sick feeling it shouldn't. When did you guys take this trip?[/B]
Two years ago. We laugh about it, but I could see if someone takes it seriously.
-
Aboutaso - How did she break her leg?
-
Originally posted by aboutasoandthis
Originally posted by drenrin2120
I figured out why he didn't want us to stop. We drove for hours into the night. I clearly remember it being midnight and being wide awake. At first what I was seeing was normal, mostly small towns. Then I started seeing weird stuff. I saw more than seven churches on one street alone. I saw street names like "Claw Creek" and "Gator Street." I didn't see any cars. Eventually, I clearly saw an advertisement for a white supremest organization. I then saw a two, count them, two anti-lynch law signs. The road we were on was never straight. My mom kept accidentally pulling into the side roads. I'm not usually scared, but I was freaking out at that time.
This surprises me, though I have a sick feeling it shouldn't. When did you guys take this trip?[/B]
Two years ago. We laugh about it, but I could see if someone takes it seriously.[/B]
Wow, 2005, that's kinda sickening, but I can see how you would joke about that later.
I've had horrible things happen and thne laugh about them later. Like one time I went to tackle my friend Tyson and I kinda tripped and grabbed him awkwardly while we were running and we both fell, me on top. I ended up spraining his ankle, but we laugh about it now. Though I was laughing real hard even after that, until he said "haha, ow, that really hurts, I think you broke it" for the fifth time. Then it became complete and utter :o "I'm an ***"
-
We're not really sure. She remembers some kind of sinkhole being in the ground where her foot slipped in. Remember, all of us were well into the water so no one could see what actually happened. She didn't feel any pain until the next day. She just knew she couldn't walk.
In real life I talk non-stop if I want to tell a story. I forget people have to read this stuff.
-
OOOH! Even better one!
One time jynce came back like any of us cared.
-
I donno but I didn't laugh at any of them...
Sounds like some things people do in reality tv that a couple of nerds/stoned people/whatever sit and laugh at or say some typical "dude! That was awsome!" line.
I mean what the hell is fun with crucifying jesus? In Denmark a paper just made a comic with Mohamed and their embassy in all those countries was raided and burned down.
I mean goddamn, respect peoples faith, I would call it justified if the guy would've grabbed a dagger and then stab you in the chest three times.
Gah, I'm not even going to bother, retarded is what it is. Shape up.
-
Originally posted by ZeroKirbyX
OOOH! Even better one!
One time jynce came back like any of us cared.
LOL!
-
This one time, at band camp...
-
(continuing from FFL) ...last season a drumline guy dressed up as a girl and the drumline taped him against a wall. We did King Kong that season. It was funny.
-
I once got in a fight on school, though the guy was like twice my height, so I had no real chance of winning. What I did was to stand there and everytime he laid a punch I just kept saying things like "Is that all you got?" and "Stop slaping me like a sissie." Then the dude kicked me in the balls. Like, a real, strong, KICK IN THE BALLS. What I did? Nothing, I stood there, the guy looked at me in awe, and I said "Leave here now before I get mad." the guy walked away.
When he was far enought I fell to the ground because of the pain. OH THE PAIN.
The next day the guy was expelled from school.
-
lol.
-
roflmao!
-
This one time, at band camp, a friend of mine broke his Lil' Playmate.
Y'know, the Igloo Lil' Playmate ice chest?
:)
-
lol.
-
I ran into a lamp post FULL SPEED one time 'cuz my friend was chasing me. He said he wanted to "eat my arms" cuz they were "annoying him." I mean I guess I should have asked what he meant but he looked serious dude. I still have a scar over my eyebrow from where it happened. It's actually kinda badass. I tell people a tiger did it.
-
XD WTF!? He wanted to eat your arms and he looked serious!? XD
-
Why was he running away if he wanted to eat your arms?
-
Originally posted by thepsynergist
Why was he running away if he wanted to eat your arms?
No, he was running TOWARD not away. ;D
Red Giant was running away, he was running toward.
-
-This one time, when I was 7, I was chewing on a ketchup packet in front of our computer. Typically, it popped. Dad caught me, got mad, and told me to take a shower (....I didn't get it, either).
I don't know why I started chewing it...I mean, I don't even like ketchup. ^_^;
-During my ninth-grade-graduation, I was called up to the stage for a special award. They wanted me to make a speech.
Trivia time! In Puerto Rico, graduating grades vote on a name for their class--some word in another language that means 'beatiful victor' or 'hope' or 'japanese school girl fighting tentacle monster with love' or some crap like that. The group chose Acrobaxtu or Orionix or some crap like that. My 'speech' was composed of me asking the group, 'What the **** did *word* come from?'.
Yes, I dropped the 'f'-bomb in front of a whole theatre full of ninth-graders-cum-tenth-graders, and their parents, and/or sisters and brothers. And the teachers. And the principal (who was right next to me). And I didn't even mean it...of course, everyone started laughing. My dad didn't let me live it down--he took it as a joke and reminded everyone about it for the next six months. Then a few months after that , Mom bumped into one of the other moms at the super market, and they started talking about it again. Whoops...
Interesting stuff. Stay tuned for more TALES OF INTEREST!!