Make a wish and have it horribly corrupted!

[Red Fox]

No, he is actually referring to a very old and obscure porno made during the time slavery was legal in America.

I wish I had a power of making things out of order.

[fruckert]

Granted, your atoms go all out of order

I wish my dog didn't just let off that smelly dog fart >_<

[Dominicy]

Granted.  Predictable joke about feces goes here.

I wish I didn't forget this wasn't the ask a stupid question thread about a question ago XD

[Uberpwn_w00t]

Granted. Bluhman appears in a dark corner of your room, and the last words you hear before he shoots you are "Can I get a clear shot from here? I mean, really."

I wish I could projectile vomit white hot molten steel, without causing any damage to myself.

[WarxePB]

Granted. After a night of binge drinking, you puke hot metal into your toilet, melting it and the floor below. You then fall through the hole and snap your neck.

I wish that I could juggle pies.

[DedlellyDeth]

Granted. They are cowpies however and one time you miss...

I wish I could live in the internet.

[Darkfox]

Granted, your soul is now, lost eternally wandering the vast electronic super highway of the internet, then you get spotted by a AVG and mistakingly marked as a trojan...

I wish I had a dollar for every time a person made a wish.

[Red Fox]

Granted. You now own all the money in USA and all of it's population wants you dead. So you have to use all the money you earned to build yourself into a fortress which you never can leave.

I wish my wish was a really great wish that made all other wishes seem pathetic in comparison.

[Darkfox]

Granted, you get no wish. Except now the sun is a black hole sucking everything up into Oblivion, congratulations! You destroyed us all!

I wish I had a power pellet like Pac-Man so I can break the laws of physics and eat malicious spirits.

[Dominicy]

Granted.  You're mistaken for the Ghost Busters, and are incessantly followed by thirteen year olds who think singing one line over and over from the theme-song makes them retro.

I wish for a pet smurf.

[Darrellito]

Granted, but an evil wizard either eats them or tries to make them into gold. It was never clear to me.

I wish Marijuana was legalized already.

[Darkfox]

Granted but you get cancer, not because of smoking but of EVERYONE ELSE smoking so much it creates a thick deadly cancerous smog in the air. And yes, it's terminal.

I wish I was Chuck Norris.

[WarxePB]

That's blasphemy. Not granted.

I wish that I had really long fingers.

[Fisherson]

Granted you become an evil Gremlin and terrize the country side until a brave hero slays you a get laid by the fair princess.


I wish had the power to shape the galaxy using my computer.

[WarxePB]

Granted. But your computer crashes, thus destroying the galaxy.

I wish for two more of those.