Make a wish and have it horribly corrupted!

[fruckert]

Granted, it's due to the powers of "HOW THE HELL DID MY PORN SEARCH BRING ME HERE?!?!"

I wish that I had a button.

[Fortet]

Granted - once pressed, it brings out many, many gay men (I'm not helping the porn thing, am I?) who want you and you alone.

I wish for something.

[fruckert]

Granted, you get lava. It burns your face off.

I wish that I didn't just sneeze.

[carrionmarksman]

Fine but it sucks cause there's a magical fairy called bob who get's you out when the game starts.

I wish there was a game where you could create anybody and play as he/she/it through the entire game with a sword or gun or magic or whatever

This one was epicly old, but

Go play Fable II.

And Fruckert - You didn't sneeze but you wet your pants trying not to sneeze.

[Fisherson]

Granted,  but it becomes nothing again in three seconds.

I wish the we could find another earth-like wold and fly there in my life time.

[fruckert]

Granted, but three seconds upon landing you die of old age.

I wish that figuring out if you jumped on top of an enemy wasn't so friggin hard.

[Rahl]

Granted its no longer friggin hard, but painstakingly hard as hell.

I wish for a pot of gold so that I can get a new laptop.

[Fisherson]

Granted, but it's fools gold.

I wish I had a 99999 exp.

[carrionmarksman]

granted, but you need 10000 exp to level up.
I wish that i could do a barrel roll.

[Rahl]

Granted but his would have been better anyways.

I wish I could ninja post.

[Dominicy]

Granted.  The only one who's bothered is you, and that's for unintended reasons.

I wish I had an angel, for one moment of love.

[Rahl]

Granted but afterwards you feel inexplicably sad because you realise it wasnt a girl you wanted after all.

I wish life was less like a box of chocolates and more like a box of labled taffy.

[Roland_Deschain]

Granted, but then charas drops the changing ads feature for constant gay porn ads.

I wish I could actually stick around here for more than like a month

[Roland_Deschain]

Holy crap I have a cat?
I thought I got rid of all of those...

[Roland_Deschain]

Granted, you didn't forget to make one but the boards removed it anyway due to gaining self-awareness.

I wish I could understand the words to Children of Bodom songs...