MIContest One

[Alex]

No way!
But if you think the idea is interesting (well, if Jesus think it is), we have a fresh new admin... don't we? 

[ellie-is]

We do?

[Prpl_Mage]

We do?

Yeah, it's your super important duty as admin to give voice to the forum. Which in this case means this contest

[ellie-is]

You guys remember that I barely even speak English, correct?

Ho pensato che noi Admins dovuto apena di parlare italiano!

Edit: Just testing stuff - JiM

[Moosetroop11]

...which will make it even more amusing!

Anyway, we need more entries.  Do it, prpl.

[Meiscool]

Agreed. Come on peoples, have some forum spirit! It is fun

[Prpl_Mage]

Old man: Catch me some dinner you wretched boy!

*throwing the line*

Old man:Are you completely daft Landon! The Z key is the key you have to press!

*retrieves fish*

Old man:Friggin finally Landon!

Old man:You fish like a real turkey, took like forever!

*returns rod*

Old man:YOU BROKE MY ROD!

Landon: Did I do that?

Old man:Yes you did you badger-nudged sack of potatoes.
You better learn to fish right or you'll get the belt.

Old man:I don't even remember why I, the blacksmith
took on such a worthless punk.

Old man:Seriously.

*walks away*

Pete: Landon!
Over here!

Pete: Don't cry!!!

Landon: You'll hug me?

Pete: No!
Sheez, Just don't start crying again okay?!

*Enter building*

Landon's thoughts:
Those super mean people are so mean. Why do I even stay here when they are totally hurting my feelings. I'm just so filled with sadness that I want to use Z to attack some of their furry cattle.

*attacks furry cattle*
*Exits building*

Pete: Now that was rather unnecessary.
Now how are we going to get enough kebab food for the annual avalanche.

Pete: Here, Give me some real money in exchange for this imaginary currency I invented.

*money exchange*

[drenrin2120]

I'll have some spirit when my soul returns after finals.

[Archem]

I can't honestly say I've got anything resembling an idea of how to approach this. I like that we're getting community fun-time back up and running, but I don't plan to participate this time. If things are a bit more my speed next go around, I'll hop on it.

So, like, just showing my support, guys.

[A Forgotten Legend]

Four entries isn't too bad.  It could be worse. haha

[Meiscool]

I was hoping that with exams over more people would have time to enter

I'll leave this open for a little bit more, then begin the judging.

[Meiscool]

Judging:

Note - Since the amount of entries were so low, I'm gonna be lax on the rules. Therefore I did not count exact sentences and such. However, the word rules still will be evaluated. On to the ratings:

~Moosetroop11~
Personal Comments: Loved it. I laughed several times, especially at the "My left arm keeps hitting me" part. The sexual portions were lovely as well. Your "Landon's Though" is kind of boring and plain compared to the rest of your text, but I guess you were trying to keep him the 'normal' character.
Relevance: As far as relevance goes, the text fits, but since there was really no mentioning of Landon killing the rats, I can't rate that very high. You did well with creativity and placing your words. I feel if you had put more of the actions occurring in the text (such as why Landon was walking into the house) you would have rated higher here. 6/10.
Humor: I get the feeling that humor was the subject you were working towards. You made me laugh several times, and the humor was relevant to the events and correlated with the animations very nicely. 8/10

~Bluhman~
Personal Comments: Insanely creative and funny! I love how you use the words too. Most people used them at the beginning, but you saving avalanche till the end was a nice build up and very original use.
Relevance: Even though those exact words wouldn't be used in a serious game, the premise remains that you did explain why Landon walked north, into the house, and why he received the sand dollar. I assume the capital letters are for when the old man turned around and the explanation marks flew out. That is the only part that doesn't really fit in my opinion, since it sounds like a normal sentence then turns into the loud shocking wordage at the end, when in the movie the whole sentence is capitalized. Otherwise, excellent. 9/10
Humor: This made me laugh a great deal. I love the absurdity of it, and the fact that the humor was related to what Landon was doing made it even better. Other people did the "dancing man" section better than you did, but I think you come out on top everywhere else, especially with the old man and the end reward. Don't ever stop with the randomness Bluhman, I LOVED IT.  9/10

~AFL~
Personal Comments: Let me just say that you messed up a little with who should've been saying what. Though it isn't completely thrown on there, the (...) bubbles and the change in the color of the text box show when Landon is talking. You didn't give Landon any lines, which kind of messes me up when reading the script while watching the video. This isn't to say that you did poorly or anything, just that I can't get as 'into' your text as the other entries.
Relevance: All the text works fine. You made sure to mention why Landon was walking where he was, and you picked a good place to have Landon's though. Putting avalanche in the thought was something I didn't expect people to do, so points for originality and minus points for laziness (since you can pretty much through anything into a thought easily). As for my gripes you didn't really make any mention of why Landon killed the crazy guy's test subjects, which ruins the relevance a bit. 7.5/10
Humor: I really enjoyed the sexual tension at the beginning. I feel you had a really unique approach to the fishing escapades. However, after the first sexual joke I could predict the next one and the next one. I found reading it very amusing, but since I knew what was cuming I didn't laugh as much as I might have were the jokes a bit more random. I did get a kick out of the "Not-Guy" part, but can't give you too much for that since it is pretty obvious that this game doesn't have a name and colon before the text. 6/10

~Prpl_Mage~
Personal Comments: I really liked this one. I feel like it could actually be in the game. Mild humor that isn't distracting, with randomness that is still relevant to the situations. Very nicely done, no complaints.
Relevance: This takes the cake for relevance, hands down. The text isn't ridiculous, and the thought you gave explained a lot of what was going on. I gave a 5 sentence cap on the thought; you were the only person to take advantage of the cap and it helped you greatly here with the scoring. You made "Pete" a very believable character, as well as made it seem like he is not just some random person but is actually a character that Landon knows fairly well. English teacher analysis of the literature aside, the text works very well with the video, explains everything that is going on, fulfills the requirements placed on the contest, and is creative. I see no reason to not give this a perfect score.... aside from your second sentence not actually being a question 10/10
Humor: Not gonna dive real deep into this one. The randomness was pleasant, not distracting, and gave me chuckles. The use of "furry cattle" as a substitute for rats made me nearly spit out my drink, but other than that nothing else made me 'lol'. An amusing read, but not the best. Great use of avalanche too; I snickered at the thought of an annual avalanche. 7/10



All that is left to do is get the second judge's opinions and name the winners. Thanks to everyone that entered; I hope you had as much fun writing these as I had reading them.
Tips/ideas for the next contest are welcome (Archem ).

[Moosetroop11]

Ack!  I wasn't really thinking about relevance at all, in that way! I guess randomly going into a house and killing rats without provocation is a bit weird :p

Nice to see the judging begin! I reckon the next contest will get at least one more person.

[Archem]

I always go straight for the avatar contest vote, simply because I'm the highest-winning member.

Alternatively, how about

[A Forgotten Legend]

Meh.  I probably could've written a  better one.  I totally went with the "..." as being silence for some reason. XD  I completely agree with your judging though.