A new idea. (please review and give comments/suggestions.)

[Ephiam]

ello everyone.  I have been thinking on yet another story lately.  However, this one I was thinking on making a game based off of.  I know the story may not be good and developed as of yet, but I hope that some of you can give me some feedback ( no spam or stuff like "it sucks." If so, tell why and also say what I can do to improve upon it.  Otherwise, I shall ignore it.)


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STORY:

-----Untitled as of yet.-----

   " The proclaimer of destruction, one of oblivion, and ender of life now draws near.
     From it's might the 12 shadows emerge and drown all in everlasting sorrow.
     Weeping lands dry wither and shatter.  Moaning lakes dry and corrode.
     Raging forests burn in the everlasting flames of hell. It has come.

    Whence all is reduced to nothing, the proclaimer, god of everlasting destruction,
    epitome of hate, sorrow and pain moves on....to devour again."


"Legends told by the elderly ones speak of a gargantuan fiend that purges a world of it's life.  Whence the dawn of it's  on-comming  approaches, time it's slef is said to stop.  The land is cast into ever lasting shadows and the fertile soil beings to dry.  Demons and monsters are said to run in fear, going on wild rampages througout the land in fear of their on coming death.  From this blood stained world in which the fiends lay before themselves, the twelve shadows are said to come forth and erradicate all life.  Hereafter, the bringer of destruction casts it's unholy shadow upon the land, reducing all to nothing."

" Who ever tells such tall tales is one of great imagination in my book.  'Tis merely a story to scare the young ones.  Nothing with such a calibur of strength exists amongst the worlds, for if it were true...don't you think we would have heard of it?"

"The old ones hold great knowlegde....some are even said to have predicted the destroyer's oncoming."

"Exactly.  They "foretold" it, predicted it.  No one of such lies can be accused of being 'normal' after vomiting such tall tales."

"Ah...so what do you exactly mean by your abundance of words?"

"They.Are.Nuts.  Most of them are crazy anyway.   So why would anyone in their right mind belive such childish jibberish?"

"No one knows.  But the wise ones fortell of this.....so everyone now fears for the worst."

"Their not very wise if they belive in such nonsense.  Heh.  Even if such a thing DID exist..our world has the power of the all-mighty Tree of mana.  Nothing of such dark powers could ever make it passed the tree's allmighty barrier."

" Ah. So you belive that our magic could protect us? let's just hope that our tree holds such holy powers."

" Of course it does.  If that single tree was able to stop the great war that stared after E's downfall...then it could surely do such a miracle again.  After all...why would it let soemthign happen to it's home?"



--The Tree Of Mana blessed it's self upon the planet, Gaia, many, many years ago.  It is said that when the world was war-torn and dying, a great light shone forth from the sky and blessed the land.  From this light came a seed of great power upon which burried it's self into the blood stained fields and instantly gave life to everything and everyone around it.  At that moment a great tree took root.  This tree brought upon everyone great happiness, joy and comfort.  Upon the blooming of this living miracle, the war ended and the great gift of Mana was bestowed upon the world.

Ever since then the tree lay dornment within the Sacred Forest, resting within the walls of the temple of mana.  Waiting and watching over it's home....Gaia.

[oooog]

This story seems very similar to another games plot.....with a few minor details changed here and there.....Some of the main vocab from the game is used in your story....

May just be me though.

[Ephiam]

No!  How can trhat be possible! I put down what ever came to mind. ....even though it was the rather useual stuff.