This'll take some time to settle in.

[Grandy]

I just got notice that a friend of mine suicided this weekend.

He apparently went to the top floor of our shopping center and jumped from there.

It's... just the kind of thing you never expect would happen to someone you know.

[SaiKar]

I am sorry for your loss. Which is something people mostly say when you lose a family member, but a good friend is no less close.

Life can be fun and games most of the time, but every now and then something shocking happens and it reminds us about the stuff that matters.

Give your other friends a call. Not to talk about this, but just to see how they're doin'. Even if it's not a matter of life and death, you never know when someone has had a completely crappy day and how a single person taking the time to talk to them can turn it all around.

[FFL2and3rocks]

Damn...

[Legacy of Elecrusher]

Well um... This isn't wasn't what I was expecting when I clicked this topic... Um... Well now I feel bad.

[Valiere]

That's rough. My condolences.

[fruckert]

... D:

[Rahl]

Sorry man, can't imagine one of my friends doing that.

[Grandy]

Okay, it was a harsh night, but I feel rather better this morning.

That or it just hans't dawned to me yet.

See, he was a friend, indeed, but it has been months since I last heard of him. I did talk to him once or twice when we met in the bus, but nothing besides greetings and how are you doings.

He was also a jerk. I remember back in school, he'd in each conversation randomly just make fun of the person directly in front of him, me, just to. Still, back in school I had a major problem with talking to anyone, and he was one of the few to ever acknowledge my existence to actually talk to me. He wasn't the best of the friends, but I still was grateful for his friendship.

I remember he had nicknames. Lot's of them, in fact. Mostly at least partially perjurative, if you know the context behind. He'd be "Mice", for he was small and looked positivelly as a rodent. Or he'd be the "Samurai", because everyone loved a good irony and he did not look like a samurai. But to most he'd just be "Vinny", short for Vinicius.

They say the reason he killed himself was because his girl dumped him. That's kinda wrong. I mean, I have no doubts that must have been the last drop of water which made the glass overflow, but I remember talking to him on our way back home from practices (he was my pertner in karate as well, nights after classes), and well, he had problems. His parents were in constant arguing with each other, as in, if his father got too close on the house he'd be arrested. On the few times his father gave us a ride back home, I got the feeling he thought about his son more as an obligation than a person. Other times, when his mother gave us a ride, she was friendlier, were not for the fact she spent the whole ride just badmouthing his father.

 I believe he also drank for the sake of getting drunk, on parties, and smoked marijuana, but that is not in my opinion directly related. Most my friends get drunk and smoke marijuana in a daily basis. It's not that uncommon where I live.

 What saddens me the most is that, even thought I never actually hang out with him, as in going to places togheter, I aways happened to find him wherever I went. Shopping center? Met him there. Otaku Conference? Met him there. Gaming Conference? Met him there. Walking down the streets? Met him there. Taking a bus back home from late night from cram school? You bet I met him there. He seemed to be in all places I went, for a reason or another, and it helps to the fact that he had the almost same tastes and lived near me, but it's just hard to believe someone I met so often and who seemed so omnipresent is simply... no more.

 Other thing that strikes my mind is that he was lovestruck with his girlfriend. It was obvious, since every single time I met him, he was with her, blowing kisses and hugging and all those things that at the time made me positively sick. Even so, I'd never even imagine he'd go so far as ending his life for her. It's just... stupid.

 Really, my sadness for his loss is just a few inches smaller than my rage at his stupidity. I won't go on about this much, but... what he did was just asnine. He was younger then me, for God's sake, and I just went 19 yesterday. He had just became of age, then he goes and throws it all away.

 I didn't catch his funeral. It was back in sunday, before I got the news. I don't even know where he was buried. I should ask my friends, at least to pay my respects.

[lilsniffs3]

Sorry for your loss.

[Uberpwn_w00t]

Not to sound insensitive or anything, but yeah. It does sound like he was being pretty stupid.

Nevertheless, that sucks. On a related note, I was recently informed that the sister of one of my close friends died in a car accident, on the way to a party that I attended a long time ago. Apparently he had been extremely depressed for a time. I felt like shit for the rest of the day.

While it's difficult for me to feel any emotion from human loss when I don't have any social or emotional connection to the victim, I am sorry for your loss.

Keep fighting the good fight, Grandy.

[Zerlina]

I'm really sorry for you Grandy.  I've never experienced anyone close to me intentionally taking their life, so I know I can't truly understand what you're going through. All the same, I really hope that you, his family, and his other friends get the support and comfort you need. Sorry again.