Make a wish and have it horribly corrupted!

[Meiscool-2]

Granted, but the cookie has aids in it and for some reason you ate it with your ***. Good job.

I wish that SOMEONE knew how to play THE GAME.

[Uberpwn_w00t]

(Assuming you mean this game) Granted, but the the thread gets locked and sent to the junk bin before that someone gets a chance to post in it.

I wish I could shoot lasers from my fingertips.

[Red Fox]

Granted but the lasers goes backwards so if you fire them your hands will be blown off.

I wish my right hand could talk.

[Uberpwn_w00t]

Granted. It's quite the talker. In fact, it talks too much. Well actually, too much is an understatement. It talks every second of every minute of every hour of every day. It doesn't let you concentrate on anything, it doesn't let you sleep, and the frequency at which it outputs it's voice is enough to drive anybody insane. Long story short, it leads to a suicide attempt. Unfortunately, it is stopped, and you are forced to sit in a little white box for the rest of your life, all the while enduring the horror of your over-talkative hand.

I wish I had a titanium spork.

[Drakiyth]

Granted. It's quite the talker. In fact, it talks too much. Well actually, too much is an understatement. It talks every second of every minute of every hour of every day. It doesn't let you concentrate on anything, it doesn't let you sleep, and the frequency at which it outputs it's voice is enough to drive anybody insane. Long story short, it leads to a suicide attempt. Unfortunately, it is stopped, and you are forced to sit in a little white box for the rest of your life, all the while enduring the horror of your over-talkative hand.

I wish I had a titanium spork.

Granted, but the spork is nuclear and you're poisoned with radiation.

I wish I had a pocket cleric.

[Uberpwn_w00t]

Granted, but one day it decides to give you this guy's disease.

I wish I could squirt noodles from my kneecaps.

[Red Fox]

Granted. But during the apocalypse Satan turns all noodles into giant flesh eating monsters wich causes your knees to spawn Giglamech the king of the flesh eating noodle monsters. Wich then proceed to eat you and the rest of man kind.

I wish this wish was alive.

[Drakiyth]

Granted. But during the apocalypse Satan turns all noodles into giant flesh eating monsters wich causes your knees to spawn Giglamech the king of the flesh eating noodle monsters. Wich then proceed to eat you and the rest of man kind.

I wish this wish was alive.

Granted, but your wish bites your cack off.

I wish I could teleport.

[Uberpwn_w00t]

Granted, but one day your aim is a little off, and you teleport into hell, where you are strapped down and sexually tortured by Satan for the rest of eternity.

I wish I had the Pick of Destiny.

[Red Fox]

Granted. You got the PoD. You break it. Satan comes. You challange Satan to a Rock off. You lose. Your now Satans sex slave for ever and ever.

I wish you could buy the letter "H" in a can.

[X_marks_the_ed]

THE GAME.

You just lost. I'm not sure what, though.

Granted. But they give you five Q's and only two U's.

I wish I could fly, up so high, to the sky.....

[Darrellito]

Granted, But only if you think of terrible nightmarish things.

I wish life were more like Roleplaying Games.

[Vlad Shadeu]

Granted, but you always have to roll at least a 5 to suceed and you are given only a four sided dice and lack any positive modifiers whatsoever.

I wish everyone elses wishes got granted with no penalties to anyone.

[_JeT_]

Granted, but I have become dictator of the world, millions win the lottery, everyone becomes rich, the world becomes unified... but difference in opinions, and social standings, eventually lead to World War 3, which will lead to the use of nuclear and biological weapons, but since nothing bad can happen, people can no longer die, and have to forever live in the war torn world, and have to put up with their seemingly wonderful lives.

I wish I was dictator of the world.

[Fisherson]

Granted, but now earth is destroyed by alien children just to anoy their parents.





I wish that had a real R2 unit and was a real Jedi.