TEXTVENTURE - Wordplay to the EXTREME!

[Archem]

You decide that EXPLORATION is key. There are only two ENTRIES to the KITCHEN, and you already came in through one of them. The other leads into a moderately-sized ROOM with a TV, a COUCH, and a CLOSED DOOR.

[fruckert]

> Is the TV on?

> Ask Vincent what's through the closed door.

[Archem]

There are re-runs of THE WONDER YEARS on the TV. You hate that show. Or do you? You can't remember. What was it about again? You decide to ask VINCENT if he likes it, and plan on mimicking his response. He instead decides to blabber on about how the DOOR on the far side of the ROOM leads UPSTAIRS, where his BROTHER'S LAIR is. Chatty Cathy.

[Archem]

//May we CONTINUE (Y/N)?

[Archem]

//The game will enter demonstration mode until continued.

[Uberpwn_w00t]

>[Y]
>Ask for RECAP
>Hope other people still want to DO this

[Archem]

//Uh, damn, I forgot what was going on. Let's all re-read it a bit and recap on our own. If you asses are too lazy, I'll recap once I've re-read this. Sure wish it hadn't gone into hibernation for so long.

[Moosetroop11]

>NEW PLAYER ENTERS the ROOM
>Hello NEW PLAYER. This  thread looks COMPLICATED. Would you like to view the TUTORIAL [y/n]?
>n
>SAY: Hi guys! what's up?

[Archem]

LOAD SAVE 01

Save loaded.

//Fast forward through the lame stuff, and get to the point!

You get your trusty rusty KNIFE out, and REMIND yourself of RECENT EVENTS. You SNEAKED into this ramshackle APARTMENT COMPLEX, where you learned about MAURICE "ROCK DOG" LASTNAME, his GANG and that he knows of your PRESENCE. It is assumed that he has SKELLY'S GATE KEY. You ASSAULTED VINCENT, ROCK DOG'S YOUNGER BROTHER with your KNIFE. After SMOOTHING THINGS OVER with him, you convince him that you are in the GANG, and that you are called SNAKE. The GANG is searching for you, but being around VINCENT will likely throw them off your trail. You are standing in a KITCHEN with two DOORS one leads back into the MEETING ROOM, while the other is still unexplored. ROCK DOG'S LAIR is UPSTAIRS, but you don't yet know how to get there.

[fruckert]

> BARGE into UNEXPLORED ROOM, shouting profanities whilst acting drunkenly.

[Archem]

You KICK in the DOOR after downing a few PINTS of GREEN BEER that you saw lying around. Perhaps that wouldn't be advisable, but it's too late for that. You yell a few UNLADYLIKE INSULTS with your SLUR VOCALIZATION settings cranked all the way up. Most people would be quite OFFENDED at your insistence of the DOOR'S heritage, but who can blame you for what your SLUR VOCALIZATION does? Poor VINCENT shouldn't be subjected to your VULGAR RAVINGS any longer, so we'll wait for the part where you're sober again.

VULGAR RAVINGSCRAFT LEVEL UP!

You assign your SKILL POINTS and lose any STATUS EFFECTS because of the LEVEL UP. VINCENT explains that this ROOM is actually a STAIRWELL, a fact that you feel could have been DEDUCED without his input. You feel that you've been robbed of DEDUCTION EXPERIENCE, but you don't complain. He still seems shocked by your LEVEL 47 VULGAR RAVINGS, which have only grown stronger since he last heard them.

[Uberpwn_w00t]

>PROCEED up STAIRWELL with caution
>LISTEN carefully

[Archem]

You perk up your EARS and take the first step up. You don't seem to be picking up on much of anything, but it sure is DARK up here. At any minute, your SPECIAL ABILITY could activate! Perhaps you should USE something in your INVENTORY to avoid another nasty spill.

[Uberpwn_w00t]

>PAUSE
>CHECK INVENTORY

[Archem]

//Man, I had to re-read the whole damn thing to update my inventory list. I forgot how funny this got.

You check your INVENTORY

INVENTORY:

CELL PHONES (2)
DETERGENT
KEYS
LANTERN
LOCKBOX
LOVE NOTE
MISMATCHED SOCKS
NAILS (3)
OLD MAP
PAINTBALL GUN
PANTS
QUARTER (1)
REVOLVER
RUBBER BANDS (3)
RUSTY KNIFE
WALLET (EMPTY)
WALLET > EXPIRED GIFT CARDS, RECEIPTS, BABY PICTURES, ID (BUT NO EGO OR SUPER EGO)