Make a wish and have it horribly corrupted!

[Roland_Deschain]

Granted, you wake up during the apocalypse.

I wish for a magic toaster.

[fruckert]

Granted, all it does is spew out ferrets every time you pull the plunger.

I wish that the next person would be stuck in a maze of mirrors with Twilight playing over and over and over again ad infinitum.
And they couldn't get out.

[Roland_Deschain]

Granted and not corrupted. I have the rifftrax for the movie, so I'll just play that on my ipod ripoff thingy while the movie plays.

I wish for super drawing skills.

[Fisherson]

Granted, but the days of the old west are over and now your skills land you in prison.


I wish I was Soundwave.

[Rahl]

Granted but its annoying and everyone hates you, plus you feel the impulse to sodomize baby animals, with a fork.

I wish I couldlive forever.

[Roland_Deschain]

Granted, except you live forever in an interdimensional cube of nothingness that's about the size of a particularly small rat.

I wish I had super drawing skills that are ART related, and not gun related.

[fruckert]

Granted, but you can only draw yaoi, or however it's spelled. I really don't want to Google it to figure that out.

I wish I knew the meaning to life.

[Roland_Deschain]

Granted, but you go mad from the revelation and become a gibbering vegetable for the rest of your life.

I wish my hair was an afro....

[Musha]

Granted, but you get headlice and have to shave it off.

I wish I'd never even heard the terms "<a href="http://www.eurweb.com/images/Uhura_Spock_movie_embrace.jpg">Spuhura</a>" or "<a href="http://i227.photobucket.com/albums/dd72/sierra6661luvszackyv/Spike/springjpwk20.jpg">Spuffy</a>." (Not that I have anything against their meanings...they just sound so violently stupid when said aloud.

[fruckert]

Granted, they change to Harmione and Jarlekeuin.

I wish that I didn't have bizarre song...things stuck in my head.

[Rahl]

Granted I shoot it out and let wiuld animals rape the hole in your head.

I wish that the new Harry Potter movie would have been a little better directed.

[Roland_Deschain]

Granted, except they changed the title to Harry Dresden: Storm Front, which began a much better series of novels.

I wish I had an indestructible, legible, non-stuck together, not impossibly tiny, mint condition copy of each Discworld book and retained everything that, if gone, would hamper my ability to read them and I was immune from mutations that would stop me from reading them and that I couldn't die until I read them, along with them being kept in a pocket dimension that I am able to access through thinking about it

[fruckert]

Granted, but you aren't able to leave the pocket dimension. Have fun there in eternity!

[Rahl]

Granted, I wish you would wish for a wish.

[fruckert]

Granted. But it's something so unbelievably stupid that it makes your brain explode.

I wish for an ion.