Make a wish and have it horribly corrupted!

[Tina Branford]

Granted, but the game is then touted as a shooter for "casual gamers", and sells like hotcakes.

I wish that Michael Jackson never died.

[Fisherson]

Granted. Instead he live on as a vegetable and his empire crumbles. Are you happy?

I wish there were no more Djiin and therefore there were no more wishes! Mwa ha ha ha!

[fruckert]

Granted, but our wishes start being granted by this magic toaster here.

O great and mighty toaster, wouldst thou bequeath unto me, a new Djinn, so that thou may have some peace?

[Tina Branford]

You get a Djinn (genie?), but he refuses to grant you any wishes. And you only got one from the toaster.

I wish that I could get away with murder (but no one else could).

[Fisherson]

Granted, but it's by Orc (were there any female Orcs in LOR?) in  from tolkien's books.

I wish I Tina's boobs would grow five sizes bigger.

[Musha]

Granted.  You get laid by this woman:

<img src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_He_mhdofF9E/RYOqOBplYEI/AAAAAAAAADs/RjGJNMZ4Qok/s400/old+hag.JPG">

I wish i had eleventy billion dollars.

[Roland_Deschain]

Granted, but it gets stolen by the Grinch.

I wish for a giant pancake.

[Roland_Deschain]

Granted: You get laid by a female fire elemental. That IS what you meant by hot, right?
(In addition, my pancake was not for eating.)

I wish for one copy of Force of Will from MTG. That's indestructible, only able to be touched by me, and mint condition.

[Uberpwn_w00t]

Granted, but you lose it.

I wish Gemini would answer me on MSN so I could get band recommendations.

[Tina Branford]

Granted, but he suggests My Chemical Romance and Fall Out Boy.

I wish that people would stop trying to mentally undress me.

[Cerebus]

Granted, they now do it physically.

I wish you a merry Christmas.

[Roland_Deschain]

Granted, but you wish it to us too late and we go insane and attack you with pointy weapons.

I wish for super powers.

[_JeT_]

Granted, you finally get laid. But you catch a new STD, and your penis falls off. A dog then eats it, before you can have a doctor reattach it.

I wish for lucas to stop being so needy, and pathetic.

[carrionmarksman]

Granted. However, the wish (being so open to interpretation) causes you much grief and you later regret making it.

I wish I had a wish to make.

[Fisherson]

Granted, but you wish to no longer exist and have to tolerate Sho saying "Prepare to be iterated!"

I wish that Tina's clothes would cast "Invisible" on themselves.