Make a wish and have it horribly corrupted!

[Rahl]

Granted but its really a bowl of hairdessers.

I wish for an apple.

[DedlellyDeth]

Granted, but it doesn't go where you want it.

I wish Charas was more active, though it is nice that I know most members here.

[Rahl]

Granted, but all the active members hate you.

I wish for change.

[Kessembi]

Granted, but it's not exact change and since the magical penny arcade is in the red, it is now prone to self-destruct.

I wish I were taller.

[Darkfox]

Granted, but you didn't specify how much taller so you get so tall your head hits the sun somehow causing it to supernova and destroy us all, thanks alot!

I wish Luigi would shut up about spaghetti.

[Rahl]

Granted, now hes into Ravioli.

I wish they would remake mario 64 and hurry to finish redoing FF7.

[fruckert]

Granted. They end up sucking hardcore, as they felt the need to change the fundamental formula.

I wish that I wasn't so tired that I'm seeing homicidal leprechauns with spatulas and spoons

[Rahl]

Granted not you awake and seeing them.

I wish for fame and fortune.

[DedlellyDeth]

Granted but you are a photosensitive epileptic and have a fatal seizure when there are particularly many paparazzi one day.

I wish I could came.

[fruckert]

Granted, every corruption I come up with would probably get me banned, so have fun

I wish I had myself a lovely day

[Kessembi]

Granted, but since the day will only last 24 hours, on the 25th hour all hell will break loose and put holes in all your socks.

I with I had a hoola-hoop.

[Rahl]

Granted, but its made of molten rock.

I wish for attention.

[fruckert]

Granted.
How old are you?
If age>18 then crazy old lady who wants to have sex with you pays attention
If age<18 then crazy old man who has sex with you pays a lot of attention

I wish that I had a fish steak

[Rahl]

Granted but the fish is still alive.

I wish for acknowledgement.

[Kessembi]

Granted, but it's for the Stripper Organization of Senior Citizens; plus, they mispronounce your name during the Golden Erotic All-Stars banquet.

I wish I it would stop raining.