Charas Pub

[Archem]

Archem: *shoots EH* ANYONE ELSE WANNA ADD SOME SHITTY POST TO THE PUB?!!!

AFL: I have a que-
Archem: *shoots AFL* ANY ONE BESIDES HIM?!!!

Archem: NO?! GOOD!!! *sits down and enjoys a bowl of soup*

[A Forgotten Legend]

AFL: ...I've got to learn to keep my mouth shut...
Eh: I wish that...
*Archem shoots Eh76 again only this time in his spline*
AFL: Ha.

[Grandy]

*shwoomp*
 Razor: What the **** was that noise?!
 Grandy: It seemed like a rip in normal time and space!
 *everyone looks at Warxe*
 Warxe: ...it wasn't me! ...this time.
 Razor: Okay, what did the rip in time in space do this time?
 Grandy: *looks around* Seems to have turned the Pub in a bad musical.

*everyone else int he pub is singing*

A long time ago, way back in Chara's past,
there was a Pub, though it did not last.
And then came a man by the name of Razor,
and he made another Pub, this time with green color.

He must have been stupid to make such a thing,
but to his praises we shall always sing.
Look what he has done for us he's filled us up with cheer!
Lord bless Razor, the man who gave us

beer beer beer tiddly beer beer beer.

Grandy and Drace, PhoenixBlade, and also MeIsCool
one thing you can be sure of, Razor has their souls
for they sold it to pay for such high prices
as no one could pay it, not even princes

1 2 3 4 5

Over the mountains, under the sea, this Pub has been there,
you might find a stronger place, though I don't know where.
It's a miracle it didn't fall apart already
But all us agree that once this happens, it'll be a tragedy

1 2 3 4 5

Red and Xen, Weregnome, and the guy from the pet shop
one thing you can be sure of, they love to barhop
but since they can't find any other pub near
they come to the Pub everyday to frink their beer

beer beer tiddly beer beer beer

Lord bless the Chara's Pub!


Razor: ...well, the song WAS catchy.


 (Also, it's sung at the rythim of Beer Beer Beer from the Bard's Tale)

[Meiscool-2]

Grandy: I'm really thristy!
Archem: And I'm in the mood for something tasty!
MIC: And it's sooooo hot outside.
*Wall-busting-in sound*
Koolaid-guy: Oh yeah!
Archem: Koolaid-guy!
Razor: What the hell did you do to my wall!?!?
Koolaid-guy: Here kids, try my new flavor.
MIC: Tastes fantastic!
Grandy: Mmmmm! I love the fruity flavor!
Koolaid-guy: Oh yeah!
Razor: Oh no; that's your problem. It should be: "Oh no, look what I've done to this wonderful pub."
Archem: Lay off Razor, he brought us drinks for crying out loud.
Koolaid-guy: Oh yeah!
Razor: Lay off? If I don't fix this wall soon, my dad will beat me.
Koolaid-guy: Oh yeah!
MIC: Hey, this koolaid tastes kinda funny now.
Razor: I wonder why, seeing as he just ran through a wall and parts of the roof landed in his pitcher.
Koolaid-guy: Oh yeah!
Grandy/Archem/MIC: Ewwww!
Koolaid-guy: Oh ****! I'm out of here! *Smashes through wall and runs*
Razor: Damn, now I gotta clean this and repair two walls before dad gets home.
Rozar: RAZOOOOOR!
Razor: ****. *Laugh track*
AND NOW WE CUT TO COMMERCIAL

[WarxePB]

Got passed up for a promotion? Having an affair and don't want your spouse to find out? Just feeling angry?

MURDER. It's always the right answer.

Special: Try it now and receive a free room in the Summerwood [STRIKE]Penitentiary[/STRIKE]Resort!

*Now, back to Charas Pub: The Animated Series.*

*WARNING: This presentation contains coarse language, nudity, violence and nonsensical situations that are always resolved by the end of the show. Viewer discretion is advised.*

Rozar: What the hell happened to my pub?
Razor: It was the Kool-aid guy! He broke through the walls and gave us roof-juice.
Grandy: It's true.
Archem: We support Razor's story 100%!
Warxe: *bursts in wearing nothing but a leather thong* Did I hear someone say "roofies"?
*laugh track*
Razor: My god...
MIC: *faints*
Warxe: Yeah, MIC likes that. Anyways, I'd best get going. *leaves*
Rozar: Right... but back to the situation on hand! You'd better repair these walls, young man, or I'll stop giving you an allowance.
Razor: But it wasn't my fault!
Rozar: Listen, son. Sometimes, a man's gotta take responsibility for something he didn't do. It's called "being the fall guy". You're going to be a great fall guy when you grow up, I can tell - so consider this as getting even closer to adulthood.
Razor: *sigh*
Rozar: Now, clean up this mess or no money. *leaves*
AFL: Dude, you're boned.
Razor: Shut up. *whacks AFL with a chunk of wall*
Grandy: We've only got 30 seconds left in the show! We need to fix it quickly!

***

Rozar: Looks like you boys fixed those walls. Good job! But how'd you do it?
Razor: We called Archem's uncle, who called some guys from the mob, who found us some extradimensional nanomachines, who got the guy from next door to come over and fix them. It cost us our hidden personal fortune that no one knew about, not even us, but they're good as new!
Rozar: RAZOOOOOR!

*credits*












*Warxe sneaks in, grabs MIC's unconscious body, and sneaks off*

[Archem]

Archem: *sips roof-juice* You know, this sounds an awful lot like a joke by-
Dane Cook: *bursts through the newly repaired wall* Hey kiddies!
Archem: Yeah! Dude! You!
Razor: What the hell did I just get finished yelling about?!!
Dane Cook: A B C D E F G! I WILL KILL YOUR FA-MI-LY!
Archem: Hahaha! I remember that joke!
Dane: Help me! Help meeee!
Grandy: That Dane Cook is a silly bitch!

[Meiscool-2]

Dane: I'm leaving now, but.... *cocks shotgun* Thanks for the candy.

[game_maniac]

Game_maniac: Wait a minute... what would the Koolaid-guy be doing in a bar full of sad, lonely men? And why did he give us a drink with "fruity" flavor?

...

*gasps*


Game_maniac: Oh my good Lord, that's not the koolaid-guy, that's the kool-AIDS guy!!! He goes around from home to home convincing children male bonding is fun!

kool-AIDS guy: Now now, I think you just need a little taste of my new juice.

Game_maniac: Why is it so white?

[elementalhero76]

*Eh76 gets back up, bullet pops out of mouth*

Hirohito: wow this acid makes me invincible! I'm just like mario.

Mario :it's a me mario!

Archem: um how'd he get here?

Kool-aids: I don't know but I like burly italian plumbers!

mario: uh-oh

*kool-aids grapples mario and ***-rapes him.*

Mario: mama ****er mia! *gets little sound sounds and he runs away*

Archem: ok that was sick.

[A Forgotten Legend]

AFL: Thats the last time I have that to drink! *puts down glass and goes to the bathroom comes back in a few hours*
Eh76: ?
AFL: You have one sick mind.
Eh76: ...what the
AFL: SHUT UP BEFORE I CUT YOUR HEAD OFF!
Eh76: *runs away*
*everyone looks strangely at AFL*
AFL: Sorry.  I just had to say it.

[elementalhero76]

*Kool-aids turns red from mario's blood and transforms into a band-aid*

Band-aid: Oh yeaaah...wait...Now what?

[DaveTent92]

Dave: *Enters pub* Hey I'm new he- *sees the Kool-Aids man and walks out slowly*

[Grandy]

Grandy: Hey, guys, Warxe brought his friends here more than once, so I though I'd call my pals too. This here is Devon.
Devon: *creepy stares at everyone*
Grandy: He works in insurance busness.
Devon: *walks to a table with some beers* You know... accidents happen. *turns the table over, shattering the beer* Oh, I'm soo sorry. I'm so clumsy. *walks up to one of those TVs Pub have* *pushes it so it falls and breaks* Oooops.
Devon: *walks up to Razor* See, this pub of your is great, but all that nasty stuff can happen if you don't pay for insurance, this whole pub. *looks around* everything seems so flammable. One single match and this place could disappear forever, you know what I mean?

[Meiscool-2]

MIC: *lights match*

[Dragonium]

Tomi: *farts*