Charas Pub

[Moosetroop11]

MT11: *Eats egg*
Archem: ...I'm pretty sure you just offended one of my religions.
MT11: *Eats Archems arm*
Archem: I don't even HAVE an arm!!!
Razor: Not anymore.

[Tomi]

Tomi: You know, we haven't done much n00b bashing in the pub lately.
MT11: Yeah, things such as eggs and Archem's arm just don't hit the spot like some good ol' n00bs..

n00bnumba1: lol hi i funny in teh pub rite?      
Warxe:  
MT11: *cracks knuckles, which he has on his hoofs*
Everyone:  

MT11: o hai dair
n00bnumba1: o hi i was just upgrading ur ro--
MT11: *chomps teh nub*
Italian Guy:

Tomi: Well that was somewhat anticlimactic..

[Archem]

Archem: lolrcakexz. i wunt sum... pankaks.
MT11: ..."Pankaks"? What the hell is a-
Archem: PANKAKS! I wunt dem!
Warxe: Oh God... He's been bit!
Razor: Check his arm! CHECK HIS ARM!!!
Someone: *checks his... arm?*
Archem's arm: *exist*
MT11: That works. *checks his arm*.
Arm: *bit*
Warxe: It's spreading! The disease is spreading!
Drace: roalferz! u nubs ned tu get sum1 2 cyoor teh six0rz!
Razor: NOOOOOOOOO!!!!

*28 days later*

Mimo: *opens eyes, gets up* What the hell?
Random noob: *runs by*
Mimo: Oh damn! What was that?!
Razor: That was an infected.
Mimo: ...Ok, I saw this movie. You die at the end.
Razor: Whoa, hey, that's not cool.
MT11: Seriously, you could have at least given us a spoiler alert.
Warxe: Where's Grandy? He's the only other survivor, and if he's infected...
Grandy: I'm over here.
Warxe: Oh.
Grandy: *eats own arm*
Mimo: Wha-
Razor: He's been doing that for a while now. They just keep growing back.
Mimo:

[Tomi]

Tomi: I don't know what you all are talking about.. Archem and Drace have always acted like that, and they bit their own arms because they thought they were so called "pankaks".
Warxe: Oh, right.
MT11: Yeah, what were we worried about..
*Giant Megan00batron tears roof off the pub*
Tomi: Any ideas on what we were worried about yet?
MT11: Nope.

[Archem]

Tomi: *dies in his delusion by walking into a trash compactor*
Mimo: Was that Tomi?
Razor: Yes.
Mimo: Was he infected, too?
Razor: No, he was just whacked out from a cloud of his own flatulence.
Mimo:
Razor: Yeah.

[WarxePB]

Warxe: Don't worry. I've got a backup plan. Razor, execute plan zeta 3 phi.
Razor: ...I'll pretend I understood what you just said.
Warxe: Whatever, I can-
*Giant Megan00batron devours Warxe*
Giant Megan00batron: wherz ur god now noobs
Mimo: Oh no! Now Giant Megan00batron has access to all of Warxe's powers!
Giant Megan00batron: ya lol *sumonz a lrge liteng bolt tat killz all*
Razor: ****, I'm cut!
Mimo: Leave him behind!
MT11: You don't have to say that twice. *runs*
Giant Megan00batron: *pulls a lrge deos... deuce... god machine thingy from its **** ur now all pink lol
Mimo: GET IT OFF ME! ARRRRRRGHHHHHGgfjiofgfihnfdfdj lol *is noobed*
MT11: Looks like I'm the only one left.
Giant Megan00batron: no im here
MT11: I don't like you.
Giant Megan00batron: dont disrescept ur lrod *eats MT11* iorny lol

[Moosetroop11]

*On a beach somewhere, being fanned by bikini babes*
Alex: Execute order sixty six.
Bikini babe: Right away sir!

***

Giant Megan00batron: ROFL
Bikini babe: For charas!!! Tell Tomi... I love him.  *Whacks self over the head with nuclear reactor, causing explosion*

Giant Megan00batron: Wut teh hell ws taht?

***6 years later***

Giant Megan00batron: *Dies from radiation poisoning*

[Archem]

Everyone: *dead*
Mimo: Told you.
Warxe's Ghost: I vote we time-travel to some time where we're all alive again.
Razor's Ghost: Aye.
Drace: Yo.
Archem: Me too. I mean yes.
Time Travel Machine: Kk, let's go.
*♪let's do the time warp agaaaaaaaain!♫*

[Meiscool-2]

Mimo: *runs around*
MIC: Hey kid! What do you think you're doin?
Mimo: Hitting this wall with a hammer.
MIC: You can't do that!
Mimo: Uh-huh, my parents are dead.
MIC: Doh!
Mimo: *Runs away*

[Archem]

Mimo: *disappears, and, as thus, stops existing for the time being*














Archem: BECAUSE I SAID SO, THAT'S WHY!!!

[Moosetroop11]

MT11: ...where'd Mimo go?
Archem: Mimo doesn't exist.
MT11: Hmmm. I smell CONSPIRACY!!!
Italian guy: Sorry, that was me.

Everyone: *Shifty eyes*

DA- DUNNNN!

[elementalhero76]

Eh76: Reasons, "If im shot in page 300 76 times and I post today on my birthday, would that be my death day?"

fourth wall: *explodes into quarks.*

warxe: I thought you ceased to exist and why did you break the fourth wall into quarks?

Eh76: ... good question! Achooo! *Explodes into nothingness*

all: *anime sweatdrop looking at the fourth wall now into strings.*

[Archem]

Archem: That's it! I've had about enough of you! *snaps off Eh's arm*
Eh76: AUGH! That hurt!
Archem: Not as much as this will! *begins beating Eh to death with his own arm* Happy -grunt- birthday-grunt- you -grunt- prick -grunt-!
MT11:   That was might brutal and uncharacteristic of you...
MIC: That looked fun.
Eh76: I'm not dead yet! *gets hit again* Ow!
Tomi: *quietly leaves the room*
Archem: Whoa... Uh... Sorry, I didn't take my meds today...
All (except the mortally wounded Eh76): *aminal sweat droop*
Comprehension Levels: *dip slightly*

[WarxePB]

Warxe: BILL! BILL! BILL! BILL! BILL! BILL! BILL! BILL! BILL! BILL!-
Archem: He's skipping again!
Razor: Stupid machine... *kicks Warxe*
MIC: Ooh, novelty Warxe CD player!
Warxe: BILL NYE THE SCIENCE GUY!
Razor: Novelty?
Warxe: *spits out a CD* I've had enough of this, Razor.
Razor: Remember our agreement?
Warxe: Yeah, but prostitution is still degrading, even if it pays well.
Razor: Shut your mouth, Sophie! Now go and earn me some money!
Warxe: *sighs, puts on a dress and some makeup, and leaves*
Razor: I love people who I can boss around.
MT11: So what exactly is the deal here?
Razor: Oh, there's no deal. I just conned him into doing random stuff for me.
MT11: Nice.
MIC: Just to let you know, I am against selling your body for money.
Razor: And I don't care. We're even.
MIC: Don't get sarcastic with me! These issues should be taken very seriously and-
Grandy: *throws a corpse at MIC*
MIC: Not again! *back breaks*
Warxe: *gets up* I put a clause in my contract that prevented me from being thrown, hurled, tossed, flung or catapulted!
Razor: You didn't say anything about being chucked.
Warxe: *sigh* *walks off while writing a paper on the mistreatment of aboriginals by the Europeans since 1300 BC*

[Archem]

Archem: *gasp!* I LOVE Bill Nye the Science Guy!
Warxe: Oh yeah? Well I hate Bill Nye the Science Gay!
MIC: Ooh, word play.
Razor: Warxe, I need to point out documentation note in subsection 12 of page 37, and I quote: "I, the signer, agree to henceforth love and enjoy in an asexual form, one Bill Nye the Science Guy*. As such, I also agree to have no distaste for playing any form of CD with the BNtSG theme on it, among other forms of digital audio.

*henceforth referred to as BNtSG."
Warxe: ...I love and enjoy, in an asexual form, Bill Nye the Science Guy... Look, can I get back to what I was doing? I have a client!
Drace: *with [STRIKE]pance[/STRIKE] pants down* I'm kinda waiting here. Can I get some angle in my dangle?
Razor: Fine.
Warxe: ...Wait, did I win?
Drace: Nope. But I sure did!